Sexy Corte prefers to have an orgasm while she’s on top of me and we’re using a vibrator wedged between us. This cowgirl position puts her in control of most of our body motion (because I’m flat on my back) and lets me control of the vibrator. This position usually works very well for us… unless I start having trouble holding back my own orgasm. It’s less fun for everyone if I have an orgasm before she does, so I’ve learned a few techniques for controlling the depth of penetration while we’re in cowgirl position. There are many reasons to play with shallow penetration, and shallow penetration will usually help the husband hold off his orgasm longer than deep penetration.
Here are a few techniques the husband can use to control depth of penetration in the cowgirl position.
- Lift her up by the butt. I love my wife’s butt, so my hands are often there already when she’s in cowgirl. To control depth, I’ll use my hands to hold her up and prevent her from pushing all the way down on to me. This is extra fun when it makes Sexy Corte moan in frustration while she’s trying hard to push me deeper inside.
- Lift my leg(s) to raise her seat. Instead of leaving my legs flat on the bed, I will pull one or both of my knees up slightly to elevate my thighs. My thighs act like a seat for Sexy Corte to sit on, and the higher I lift my thighs the shallower penetration we’ll get. This technique requires less strength than lifting her butt with my hands and can be maintained indefinitely. I’ll often raise and lower my thighs several times while my wife is riding me to control the depth of penetration and hold off my own orgasm.
- Pull her chest down to yours. Pulling your chests together will automatically reduce the depth of penetration as her pelvis rotates. Feeling your wife’s breasts against you is an added bonus!
- Pull down on her hips. If I want to go deeper I’ll grab Sexy Corte’s hips and pull her down while I arch my back and push up into her. As you can imagine this doesn’t usually make me last longer, and I won’t do this if I’m struggling to avoid orgasm. This maneuver will often elicit a sexy moan from my wife!
And if you’re in cowgirl, here’s a post with some ideas for what to do with your hands.
Do you have any wife-on-top techniques to share? Leave a comment and let us know!
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One of our most frequent sex positions is cowgirl, with Sexy Corte straddling me and facing forward while I lay on my back. This is the easiest position for her to reach orgasm, and in this position I’m able to hold off my orgasm until she’s ready. While riding cowgirl her arms and legs are pretty well occupied, but my hands are free to play and roam at will! So, what can the husband’s hands do while is wife is on top?
Here are a few ideas to drive your wife crazy and enjoy her body while her arousal builds.
- Kiss! Who doesn’t love kissing? I find it extremely hot when my tongue is in Sexy Corte’s mouth during penetration.
- Play with her breasts. Pretty obvious, and the topic deserves its own post. Your wife probably has a favorite way for her breasts to be touched, and when she’s on top it’s a great time to experiment and find out what she likes.
- Suck on her nipples. I mean, they’re right there in front of your face! How can you not?
- Touch her face. Trace your fingers over her ears, cheeks, and lips. Put your finger in her mouth to suck. Hold her cheek up against yours. Let her bury her face in your neck, or vice versa.
- Rub her back. There are a million ways to rub her back, and usually I let my touch get firmer as she gets closer to orgasm. When we start I glide lightly over her skin with my fingertips, but as she gets close to orgasm I grab her firmly.
- Play with her butt. I love Sexy Corte’s butt, and when she’s on top I can’t keep my hands off it. Rub it, grab it, pinch it, spank it, whatever you both enjoy. When a woman is aroused it’s common for her pain threshold to increase, which means that she may enjoy a little more roughness than she would otherwise. Make sure to communicate about what she does or doesn’t like.
- Trace down the length of her body. She’s naked, and because she’s kneeling the full length of her body is within arms reach. Trace your fingertips from her fingers to her shoulders, then down her sides, over her hips, down her thighs and calves, and then to the tips of her toes. Then go back up!
- Grab her hips. When the wife is on top, her hips are where the action’s at. Follow her movements with your hands, or take control and guide her hips the way you want. You probably can’t use your strength to make her move faster, but you can do one of two things: slow her down, or pull her deeper onto you. Slowing her down can help you hold off your own orgasm if necessary, and pulling her deeper can give her a burst of stimulation. I often use my thumbs to trace over Sexy Corte’s hip bones, which drives her nuts.
- Rub her throat and upper chest. The breasts are obvious, but you can also get a lot of mileage from touching your wife’s throat and upper chest. Light touches here are definitely best! If she’s aroused and working hard, you might be able to feel her pulse in her neck with your fingertips, which I find to be pretty hot.
- Tickle. Ok, Sexy Corte hates being tickled in any context, but when she’s on top and aroused it drives her crazy when I lightly touch under her arms. It doesn’t seem to tickle, but it definitely gets a strong positive reaction.
When she’s ready to explode, here are three tricks for helping her over the edge.
- Classical conditioning. Pick a spot on her body to focus your touch on every time she orgasms — I use Sexy Corte’s upper back, right between her shoulder blades. When she climaxes, I rub my hand in a circle on this spot on her back (not exclusively, but frequently). As a result, her body is conditioned to orgasm in response to this touch. It’s not magic, but when she’s close to orgasm I can often push her over the edge just by tracing a circle on her upper back. A fun side effect is that the same touch often elicits a shiver and a purr from her even when we’re not in bed!
- Hold the vibrator. For the most part our wireless vibrator will stay wedged between us against her clitoris without me holding it, but as she gets close to orgasm and moves more vigorously I often slip a hand down to hold the vibrator in place. If the vibrator slides out of position at a critical moment it can really disrupt the progression to orgasm.
- Pull back her clitoral hood. If I’m holding the vibrator in place, sometimes it’s beneficial to use my other hand to pull upwards on the skin above her mons pubis. This skin is connected to her clitoral hood several inches below, and gently pulling it up will help expose her clitoris more directly to the vibrator, without risking dislodging the vibrator by shoving a (second) hand down there. This isn’t always necessary or good, but if she’s having trouble getting over the edge to orgasm this trick can make the difference.
Finally, how can you tell what she likes?
- Words. Ask her to tell you what she likes! And wives, don’t be shy — your husband wants to know how to please you!
- Moans, groans, and screams of pleasure. When she reacts positively to something, make a mental note to revisit it later. You don’t need to keep doing the same thing the whole time (unless she requests it), but make sure to revisit the touch that made her moan and see if it has the same effect again.
- Vaginal tightening. Oftentimes your wife’s vagina will tighten on you in response to pleasurable stimulation. Sometimes it just means that she’s getting closer to orgasm, but a pulse of tightness can be an unconscious indication of intense pleasure.
- Throwing her body backward or collapsing forward. If your wife is holding a body position and then suddenly surges forward or backward this can be an indication that she was momentarily overcome with intense stimulation and her body needed to reposition itself in response. Stimulation that’s too intense is uncomfortable, but as your wife gets more aroused her stimulation threshold will increase and you can revisit a touch that might have been too intense just a few minutes earlier.
- Post-sex debriefing. After sex, talk with each other about what you each liked best. What do you want more of? Less of? None of? What was your favorite way to give pleasure? Receive pleasure? Don’t debate or challenge each other, there aren’t any wrong answers. Just talk openly and honestly.
Do you have any tips to share? Wives, what do you like your husbands to do with his hands when you’re on top? Leave a comment!
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