But Marriage? Doc Says: “The lowest risk sexual activity during COVID-19 involves yourself alone” 1

It appears that Canadian doctors haven’t learned about marriage yet, and I think they’re really missing out.

[Canada’s chief medical officer] Dr Theresa Tam said in a statement there is little chance of catching COVID-19 from semen or vaginal fluid, but sexual activity with new partners does increase the risk of contracting the virus, particularly if there is close contact like kissing.

“Like other activities during COVID-19 that involve physical closeness, there are some things you can do to minimize the risk of getting infected and spreading the virus,” she said.

Skip kissing, avoid face-to-face closeness, wear a mask that covers your mouth and nose, and monitor yourself and your partner for symptoms ahead of any sexual activity, Tam said.

“The lowest risk sexual activity during COVID-19 involves yourself alone,” she added.

If only there were some way to address the “with new partners” part of the problem instead of avoiding kissing and face-to-face closeness. Hmmmm. This seems like something that should have been solved thousands of years ago.

All joking aside, marriage and family sure have been a huge blessing during this pandemic. God knows what he’s doing.

How To Make Semen Taste Better 2

I think we’d all prefer to live in a world where semen tasted like chocolate. Such a world would have no war and no crime… but then again, it might not have civilization either. In our fallen world, for better or worse, the taste of semen generally ranges from neutral to yuck, which can be a major turn-off and a significant reason for a wife to be reluctant to perform oral sex.

In our recent post titled “Level-Up Your Sex Life” we talked about giving the wife as many orgasms as she wants, and we also shared some encouragement from both husbands and wives to include more oral sex in your marriage. Along with that encouragement we think it’s important to give some practical tips that will help oral sex to be more enjoyable for the wife to perform. Here are a few posts on that topic that you may have missed:

You may think that we write a lot about oral sex, but this blog has over 400 posts! Those ten links constitute around 2% of our total posts… and husbands who crave the intimacy of oral sex make up a good 25% of the email we receive.

Ok, so to the topic of this particular post: how can you make semen taste better? You may be surprised to learn that there are actually a number of proven things you can do to improve the taste of your semen (or your husband’s). First, let’s look at some things that are likely to make your semen taste bad.

  • Dehydration.
  • Smoking, drugs, and alcohol.
  • Caffeine.
  • Red meat.
  • Dairy.
  • Processed foods, including fast food.
  • High-sulfur vegetables from the cabbage family, like asparagus, broccoli, cabbage, and cauliflower.
  • High-sulfur spices like garlic and onions.
  • Basically, if it’s bad for your breath it’s bad for your semen.

Next, here’s a list of things that are likely to make your semen taste better — but still not like chocolate, alas.

  • Water. Drinking more water will lead to higher semen volume, which will dilute the bitter/alkaline taste of the sperm in the semen.
  • Sweet fruits — particularly pineapple. Some of the sugar goes into your semen.
  • Acidic fruits, like cranberries, citrus, pineapple, and peppers. The acidity cancels out the alkaline taste of sperm.
  • Vitamin C will reduce the quantity of salt in your semen. Fruit again, including pineapple, but also celery which has lots of water.
  • Some spices, including cinnamon, cardamom, and peppermint.

If pineapple jumped out to you from the list then you’re not alone. Along with drinking plenty of water, the internet seems to agree that pineapples are a surefire way to improve your semen flavor. For people who don’t want to eat pineapples all the time, you can buy the pineapple enzyme called bromelain as a supplement — it’s like eating ten pineapples in a pill, but without the acidity, sugar, or vitamin C that seem to be important elements of pineapple’s power. For science I tried some bromelain supplements for a few days, but they made my stomach so upset that I had to stop taking them before Sexy Corte could render a verdict on their effectiveness.

Which brings us to the final question: how long will it take for a change in habits to result in a change to semen taste? The improvement will happen gradually over the course of a week as the fluid from your prostate cycles out of your body and is replenished. Presumably you can speed this process up by drinking and ejaculating more.

This post probably won’t be effective enough to bring about world peace or destroy civilization, but maybe it will help a marriage or two. Got any other tips or experiences to share? Leave a comment and let us know!

Level-Up Your Sex Life 3

We get a lot of email from our readers (thank you!) and there’s nothing more gratifying than hearing from a couple we’ve helped to boost their sex life up to the next level. God is good! If you want to level-up your sex life, then consider these two specific types of stories that we hear pretty frequently.

First and best are accounts from couples where the wife has just had her first orgasm in years, or ever! We hear from women who have been married for decades and never had an orgasm before reading our blog, and wow, nothing makes us happier. Other wives haven’t had an orgasm for years for various reasons — childbirth, kids, illness, or inattentive husbands. From these stories, it seems that the wife’s orgasms are a huge blessing to the marriage as a whole and are foundational for a couple’s sex life. Do whatever it takes to give your wife as many orgasms as she wants.

Ann wrote:

So many [posts] have been of benefit to us but particularly learning that sex toys are not “evil”. Historically, I think I had an easier time than many women reaching orgasm, but my changing 50’s body was betraying me and it was horribly frustrating (and my husband know my body, used many approaches, for extended lengths of time and nothing was working. This was not a case of believing PIV was adequate). I truly wondered if orgasms were no longer a to be part of my life. One little vibrator fixed that! Also, a few links you have shared have been of tremendous help as well. Thank you from the depths of both our hearts and bodies!!

Scott wrote:

Favorite post is “Edge-of-the-Bed Sex Positions”. This related to me because it was something we’d already just recently gotten working well (and has taken over as #1 position when using condoms). Even more recently, since reading it, my wife decided to take the vibrator plunge, and both times it was in this position. Amazingly enough, the second time led to her first (awake) O! Took 12 yr, but we finally got there! Late in intercourse, we transitioned to “Packing the Suitcase” from a related position, and that actually seemed to trigger her final ascent. I don’t think I’d have made the change to the positioning without having read that, so I really think we have your website to thank for contributing to her first time!

And now Scott and his wife are enjoying multiple orgasms!

Did want a drop a note that your post here was extremely well timed. It came right after we got my wife her first multiple-O session ever! As I’ve posted here, she’d never achieved a (non-nocturnal) O until less than 5 months ago, and now we’re getting “success” 95% of the time. I won’t go into detail, but this time she basically said to keep going, and a few minutes (and seemingly massive pleasure) later, she got a spectacular second! Let’s just say I had an unshakeable grin for quite some time afterwards. I’m guessing it’ll only be a once per month (or every few months) thing, but it was so thrilling to see my wife WANT that for himself, plus I got the joy of serving her until she got it. :-)

I appreciate what you write here, and it has contributed to my efforts and improved mindset in achieving new heights for my marriage relationship!

Second-best are accounts from couples where the wife is newly willing to perform oral sex and/or swallow. So many couples write to us overjoyed to have tried oral sex for the first time — the husbands are obviously thrilled, but you might be surprised at how blessed the wives are, too.

K wrote:

K
So… I gave it a go and swallowed for the first time today. Thanks for the inspiration! 

Sexy Corte
That’s great! Thanks for letting us know. Was your husband excited?

K
He was thrilled! It was an amazing way to bond- more than I could have imagined. You guys are awesome- don’t stop writing!!

Thunder wrote:

I took the time to have several respectful and heartfelt conversations about sex in general and about oral sex and swallowing specifically.

Earlier this week she let me finish in her mouth for the first time in 10 years. It was an amazing experience. After starting the morning that way (I was almost late for work, but who cares!), I felt very and completely loved the rest of the day.

rita_m wrote:

I’m a Christian woman in my 40s, married with 3 kids and have an enjoyable sex life with husband. I want to please him and swallowing his semen has seemed like a big step to take. We enjoy oral sex a lot and I enjoy giving very much. We progressed to me first tasting and finally swallowing his sperm and it was very strange, like venturing onto new territory sexually. Like having sex for the first time, I was really nervous, wondering how it would taste and feel like. It’s such a powerful act, ejaculation, that I was afraid of “taking it’s full force” in my mouth. I’m glad I did, he enjoys it a lot and it has brought us closer together. Now I almost insist on swallowing every occasion I get! He likes how I embrace this seed of his that he produces, and I enjoy tasting his most intimate flavors and even enjoy the taste with the variation in taste and texture.

So if you’re looking to level-up your sex life consider taking these tips from our readers: as many orgasms as the wife wants, and oral sex for the husband.

What have you done to level-up your sex life? Leave a comment and let us know!

Husbands Want Quantity, Wives Want Quality 4

Quality is better than quantity. That statement is beneficial in many ways. But what if quantity is the quality? Husbands often view sex through that lens. We get a lot of emails from readers asking about frequency. Men want their wives to have more sex. Women wonder why their husbands want to have sex so much, and often comment that they don’t enjoy it. Here are some thoughts on how to improve the quality and the quantity.

As a couple: Communication can fix a lot of problems. Sex can be awkward to talk about, but the more you communicate about your sex life the easier it is to talk about. How often do each of you need an orgasm to feel satisfied? In a week? A month? Pay attention and notice when you feel aroused. What time of day works best to have sex? What can you do to meet your spouse’s needs? Is there something you can do to make sex better? Remember, you are the only person that can meet your spouse’s sexual needs.

For husbands: If you want to have quantity, you need to increase the quality. Your wife is not going to want to have sex if you don’t bother getting her aroused, or making sure  that she is having all of the orgasms that she wants. Shift your focus from just having sex to making sure your wife is enjoying it. Around 70-80% of women need direct clitoral stimulation to orgasm. That means only 20-30% of women can orgasm through standard penis-in-vagina sex. We have wives tell us that after years of marriage they just experienced their first orgasm. If your wife is one of the majority, you have to be more creative to give her an orgasm. For many women it takes 20-45 minutes of clitoral stimulation to orgasm. Use your hand or a vibrator, and stay there. Men can be aroused in an instant, but arousal can be a lengthy process for a woman. Notice her throughout the day and be intentional in words, touch, etc. When you start to have sex, spend a while in foreplay. Sex can be painful for your wife if she is not aroused. Husband, you might be surprised by how much your wife wants to have sex when she’s having frequent orgasms!

For wives: Quantity has a quality all of its own. You might be surprised at how often your husband would want to have sex if you were available. Find out what your husband needs to feel satisfied. It’s ok to have sex and not have an orgasm, as long as you are sexually satisfied overall. Be available to your husband. Remember, you are the only person your spouse can have sex with. He will never grow tired of having sex. Pray for the right attitude towards meeting his sexual needs. Sex is not a burden, it is a gift. Sometimes it is a tricky gift to figure out! Find what makes you enjoy sex, then pursue doing that together. Your husband almost certainly wants to give you pleasure, but may not know how. If you have never had an orgasm, explore how to make that happen with your husband. An orgasm is the key to unlocking the pleasure of sex.

Remember that you are a team. You love each other. If both spouses in a marriage focus their energy on pleasing the other, your own needs will get met along the way.

Husbands can Learn from What Women Look For in Casual Sex Partners 5

Wives aren’t looking for casual sex partners (hopefully!), but husbands can learn a few things from the preferences of women who are looking for casual sex. Let’s look at the six elements listed in the article, even though we only have limited influence over several of the items.

1. You need to be taller than her.

Sadly, height bias is still very much real: 89. 5 percent of respondents said their short-term partner had to be taller than them, and only 11.9 percent viewed height as unimportant.

There’s not much you can do to make yourself taller! If you’re wearing shoes and your wife is barefoot then you can add an extra inch or so. You can position yourself above your wife in some circumstances, but not always.

2. But you don’t necessarily need to be smarter.

While having similar education levels may be important for women seeking a lifelong mate, only 46.7 percent of American women thought intelligence was an important trait in a casual partner.

Well that’s a relief! Just like height, there isn’t much you can do to make yourself smarter — but you can make yourself more interesting. If you’ve been married for very long at all, you may have noticed that your wife’s panties don’t drop to the floor when you solve an equation or win an argument on the internet. Raw intelligence isn’t as impressive as what you can do with it: write a poem, build a vibrator, use classical conditioning to enhance her orgasms.

3. Hair is great, but only if it’s on your face.

While bearded men are still beloved around the world, most women said they’d prefer a short haircut and a hairless chest for a fling than luscious locks and a virtual forest of upper body hair.

Finally! Something completely under our control. Here are some tips for husbandly grooming, and yes, you should shave your balls. Put in the (minor!) effort required to be clean and fresh.

4. You don’t have to be buff.

Unsurprisingly, about half (51.8 percent) of all women surveyed considered body type to be a very important factor when deciding on a partner for a casual encounter. But if you don’t have a six-pack or bulging biceps, don’t fret. Fit, athletic physiques were found to be the most popular among women (50.3 percent), followed by “average” body types (29.1 percent). Only 7.8 percent said they wanted someone who was very muscular.

Even if being fit and athletic doesn’t come naturally to you — as it doesn’t for me — you can take action to become the best possible you. Lift some weights. Go for a run (together!). Pick her up. You might also benefit from some more fitted clothing than you’re used to.

5. Your ethnicity and religion don’t matter.

Well ok!

6. And don’t forget to smile!

Having an attractive smile was one of the most important factors for women from almost every country in the Clue survey. So, when you’re on your date, remember to show that you’re enjoying yourself by flashing those pearly whites!

Mouthwash, toothbrush, and floss — and use some over-the-counter whitening product. But don’t just smile all the time for no reason, that’s a signal of unease, desperation, and submission for men.

Husband: if you want more casual sex with your wife, make yourself an attractive casual sex partner! (Your wife will thank you.)

Make Coronavirus a Positive Transformational Experience 6

“In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. The earth was without form and void, and darkness was over the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God was hovering over the face of the waters. And God said, ‘Let there be light,’ and there was light. And God saw that the light was good.”

Genesis 1:1-4

Right from the start God brought order out of chaos. Creation is often the first thing we learn about God. A few years ago someone pointed out to me that God’s creative process was the act of speaking order out of the chaos. In His good, perfect manner of doing so, His creation was declared good. 
Our world has abruptly descended into chaos. In a matter of a few short weeks all of our lives have changed drastically.

We are at an inflection point. The world is going through a transformational experience. Our actions right now will shape and define what our future will look like on the other side of this transformation. In a short time, many of our habits have changed. If we are not careful, bad habits will creep in. I want to encourage you that now is the time to be intentional in following God’s model of creation. It’s a time that in our individual lives we can act with integrity to bring order out of the chaos that we’re in. We all have the same amount of time, but it has shifted around. For me, the time I would usually be doing do chores I’m homeschooling instead. The time I would usually be working I’m doing chores. Our evening activities are cancelled but we’re maintaining connections through virtual socializing. Right now, as things are in flux, it’s the opportune time to look at our lives and allocate our time in a positive way.

As Christians: We can be light and hope to a world that’s in the dark. Even though many of us are isolated, we can still “rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances.” (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18) What reach could you have right now if you were being joyful instead of worrying, praying instead of looking at Facebook, giving thanks instead of complaining? How can you be generous when our instinct says to hoard? Who do you know that is suffering that you could call and offer hope to? When you are outside, how can you take some time to get to know your neighbors?

As spouses: Sit down with your spouse and have a discussion. How do we want to move on from here? Our time has shifted, so how are we going to best use it? When are we going to wake up in the morning? When is the best time for us to have sex? A date night? How can we be creative to have a date night when we can’t go anywhere? You still need to connect with your spouse physically, emotionally and spiritually. What good habits do we want to bring into our marriage right now? What bad habits have we started that we need to correct? If sex isn’t on your calendar regularly, now is a great time to make it a high priority. Make sure your spouse is sexually satisfied. Talk about your fears with each other — naming them will give you power over them. Keep a healthy diet, or if you don’t have a healthy diet, now is a good time to start one. Encourage each other. Thank each other. Play with each other.

As parents: Are you acting in a way that you will be proud of when you look back on this time? Are you acting in a way that you want your kids to imitate? How do you respond when your child walks into a room and needs something? Does your face light up to see them or do you look annoyed? Kids feel safe and secure when there is structure and a schedule. How can we establish a new schedule that allows them to thrive?

These are the questions El Fury and I are thinking about as we take tentative steps through the chaos. Thankfully El Fury is busy with work right now. He is serving our family in that capacity. Also thankfully, my work has slowed a lot, which has allowed me to adjust to the new rhythm of homeschooling. I want to serve my family by tending to their needs, encouraging them, praying together, and making good meals.

Transformational experiences are good opportunities to shape how you want to be in the future. Do this by using the timeless model that God lays out in His creation story. Trust in Him to guide you in bringing your chaos into order.

Solve Your Marriage Difficulties By Having Sex 7

We get emails from people every day who are having problems of various kinds in their marriage, and the simplest, most direct solution is often just have sex. Obviously this isn’t true in every single case, but you’d be surprised how often sex itself can smooth over differences and disagreements.

How does it make you feel when your partner is cold and distant? Or when they’re critical and prickly? Does it make you want to rip their clothes off, order in a vat of whipped cream and install a chandelier to swing from?

No? Well there’s your problem – according, at least, to Michele Weiner-Davis, the marriage-guidance counsellor whose Ted talk explaining her unconventional advice to warring couples has been viewed almost 3.5 million times online.

Her advice couldn’t be simpler: shag. Do it even if you don’t want to, do it especially if you don’t want to and, most important of all, do it frequently whether you want to or not. To make it even clearer, she’s borrowed one of the most famous advertising slogans of recent times: Just Do It. “Your partner will be grateful, happier and therefore nicer, too,” she explains from her clinic in Colorado. “It’s a win-win situation for both of you!”

Over the years, Weiner-Davis has honed her message. She’s now stripped it back to what she believes is the essence of a successful marriage. Gone is any therapeutic consideration of a couple’s history; of their emotional travails; of cause and consequence. Now she is entirely one-track minded: no matter how appalling the state of a marriage, she believes that kind, generous and frequent sex can bring it back from the teetering edge of collapse.

Let’s expand on the idea a little! Here are a bunch of related posts.

Sometimes we can get so wrapped up “communicating” that we forget the importance of body language. Maybe you should quit talking about your problems for a while and go have sex!

Do Whatever It Takes to Give Your Wife as Many Orgasms as She wants 8

Husbands, I’ll be very direct: if you wife isn’t having regular orgasms then she isn’t going to love having sex. She might enjoy the intimacy of sex, she might like to give you pleasure, she might do it out of obligation, but she isn’t going to love it.

“How often should we have sex?” There isn’t one right answer, but here’s what we say: each spouse should have as many orgasms as he or she wants. Often that means that the husband will have more orgasms than the wife does, and we think that’s fine as long as the wife has as many orgasms as she wants. In our marriage, I have an orgasm every day and Sexy Corte has an orgasm about twice a week on average. Her orgasm frequency can be pretty bursty though — sometimes she’ll have an orgasm four days in a row and get exhausted, and sometimes she won’t have an orgasm for a week and get really angsty. (It’s hot when she’s angsty).

This formula is pretty simple to follow as long as everything is going smoothly, but from experience and reader emails we’ve noticed two common problems that lead to wives not having all the orgasms they want:

  1. Some wives give up because they feel self-conscious about the effort required.
  2. Some wives give up because their husbands don’t put in the effort required.

When a wife gives up on having the orgasms she wants it’s very easy for her to become disillusioned with sex and resentful towards her husband. It’s a fact of biology and relationships that men tend to orgasm more easily than women, and husbands and wives should both be sensitive to this reality.

Let’s look at problem #1 first: yes, sometimes it’s a lot of work for a woman to reach orgasm, both physically and emotionally. Sometimes it takes a lot of time and energy. Sometimes it requires a vibrator. Sometimes it requires oral or fingers. Sometimes it’s messy. Sometimes it’s loud. Sometimes it’s exhausting. Sometimes the kids won’t go to sleep. Sometimes it’s easier to just watch TV.

“Why are male orgasms so easy and female orgasms so hard?!” I don’t know, but get over it! Wife, you don’t need to feel guilty or selfish for wanting an orgasm even if it’s difficult. Some women we’ve heard from didn’t think they could have orgasms at all, but it turned out they only needed a little coaching and openness. It isn’t “noble” or “selfless” for a wife to talk herself out of a satisfying sex life, so don’t make yourself a martyr. Take ownership of your needs, talk with your husband, and be open to trying new things. Get the orgasms you want!

Solving problem #2 starts with a question for husbands: Does your wife know that you’ll do whatever it takes to give her an orgasm? Maybe you’ve given her signs that make her think her orgasms as too much work and she’s pulled back from what she really wants. Maybe you’ve been too quick to accept her hesitation when she does want an orgasm but isn’t sure you’re willing to put in the work. Maybe you haven’t been creative or skillful enough. A wife who is self-conscious or reluctant to speak up for herself might interpret these kinds of behaviors as a lack of desire on your part to give her pleasure. She might think that you think her orgasms are too much trouble.

Husband: be direct and explicit. Tell your wife frequently that you want to pleasure her and you’ll do whatever it takes.

And then enthusiastically do whatever it takes!

As long as what the wife desires involves only the two of you, is consensual, leads to mutual satisfaction, and is done in faith then you should do it. Be proactive. Don’t make your wife nag you. Be a student of her sexuality and put in the effort to become proficient with her body!

For a husband or wife who feels they need a little education, check out this post: All About Female Orgasms (Safe Diagrams).

“If Mama Ain’t Happy, Ain’t Nobody Happy.” Husbands: if you want to maximize your sex life you need to do whatever it takes to give your wife as many orgasms as she wants. Wives: if you aren’t getting the orgasms you really want then you need to speak up and be a little more selfish!

Leave a comment and let us know if you are putting in the effort in your marriage to give you spouse all the orgasms he or she wants.

Give Thanks for your Spouse's Sexuality 9

The Bible has a lot to say about giving thanks to God for His blessings in our lives.

And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

Colossians 3:17

“Whatever you do” includes your sex life with your spouse! To celebrate Thanksgiving, here’s a list of 10 elements of your sex life that you can thank God and your spouse for. For each item, write down something specific that your spouse is or does that you are especially thankful for.

  1. Body: What parts of your spouse’s body are you most thankful for?
  2. Appearance: What about your spouse’s appearance are you most thankful for?
  3. Behavior: What sexual behaviors of your spouse are you most thankful for?
  4. Words: What sexual words of your spouse are you most thankful for?
  5. Intimacy: What forms or moments of intimacy with your spouse are you most thankful for?
  6. Giving pleasure: What ways do you give pleasure to your spouse that you are thankful you can do?
  7. Receiving pleasure: What ways does your spouse give you pleasure that you’re thankful for?
  8. Position: What sexual position are you most thankful for?
  9. Sexual activities: What sex games or activities that you do with your spouse are you most thankful for?
  10. Trying hard: What is your spouse working on sexually for your benefit that you’re thankful for? Not that your spouse has necessarily accomplished it yet, but you’re thankful that they’re trying.

There’s no need to stop at 10 — maybe these will just get you started! If you want to share your thanks, leave a comment and let us know what a blessing your spouse is to you.

One Simple Trick for Showering with Your Spouse 10

We’ve written about shower sex and the human loofah, but this post is focused on how to actually get clean while showering with your spouse.

If you’ve showered together then you probably know what can go wrong: you bump in to each other a lot, and you have to wait for access to the soap and water. Horrible! Sexy Corte and I have developed a shower dance that deconflicts our use of shower resources, and there’s one simple trick that makes it all possible: we get in and out of the shower at different times.

If we get into the shower at the same time, then we both want access to the water and soap at the same time too, and one of us has to wait on the other. However, if we stagger our entrances to the shower then our work is syncopated and we aren’t both trying to do the same thing at the same time. Magic! Usually I let Sexy Corte get in first, and then I get in after she gets wet. (Ahem.) In this way, we can naturally alternate our use of water and soap so that neither of us has to wait on the other.

Here’s an example sequence of events. As you can see, because we get in at different times we can easily take turns doing activities that require the water (bolded).

  • Sexy Corte gets in the shower and gets wet. El Fury does whatever, outside the shower.
  • Sexy Corte shampoos her hair. El Fury gets in and gets wet.
  • Sexy Corte rinses her hair. El Fury soaps his face.
  • Sexy Corte conditions her hair. El Fury rinses his face.
  • Sexy Corte rinses her hair. El Fury soaps his body.
  • Sexy Corte soaps her body. El Fury rinses his body.
  • Sexy Corte rinses her body. El Fury gets out.
  • Sexy Corte turns the water up to 200 degrees, washes her face, etc. El Fury dries off.

This post sure is exciting, isn’t it? Well, here’s a sex angle: if taking a shower with your spouse is easy and convenient, you’re more likely to have sex in the shower.

Do you take showers with your spouse? Leave a comment!

Update: In the comments Ann points out that I missed an incredibly important tip:

She soaps her body & he soaps his own? Boring!! Soaping each other is very sensual. You could condition her hair & massage her scalp—in case you aren’t aware, a woman getting her hair washed at the salon by a hairdresser is often compared to being almost as good as sex!! Much better that she think of the last shower with her husband when she is leaned back for that salon experience—she could come home wanting her new hairdo messed up…😉