Crossed Manual Stimulation Technique — Here’s a fingering technique we haven’t seen before: the husband crosses his fingers and twists them inside the wife.
This sex activity makes the wife the center of attention, while also requiring her energy and focus to make the most of the experience. Even though the husband will be doing most of the active work, the wife will be in a position that is likely unfamiliar to her, which might make it harder for her to reach orgasm. We recommend trying this position when you have plenty of time and energy to devote to it.
(For the purposes of description we’re going to have the wife in the receiving, submissive role and the husband in the giving, dominant role — but feel free to swap roles and have the wife give pleasure to her husband instead!)
We recommend a few bondage implements to make this work, but you can improvise or omit elements that aren’t appealing to you.
Handcuffs. We like the fuzzy, comfy kind that are easy to slip off if required.
Load-bearing attachment point. You need a sturdy attachment point that’s higher than the wife’s head. A doorway chin-up bar can work, or you can screw a garage hook into a joist in your ceiling. Make sure that whatever you use is the right height and strong enough for the wife to pull on.
Vibrator. We recommend a wand vibrator for this activity, but use whatever will be most effective for the wife. This position is already challenging enough, so use her favorite vibrator!
Lube. This activity can take a while, so make sure the wife is sufficiently lubricated. Keep it handy so you can re-apply it as necessary.
Blindfold. Helps to focus the wife’s mind.
Spreader bar. Keeps the wife’s legs apart during intense stimulation.
Husband: prepare everything beforehand so your wife isn’t waiting around!
When you’re both naked and ready, here’s what to do.
Turn up the heat so the wife doesn’t get cold.
Put on some sexy music. This activity will benefit from a lack of talking, and music will help the wife attain the required frame of mind.
Cuff the wife’s hands over her head.
Connect the cuffs to your attachment point — don’t make this too high! Her shoulders will be lower than normal once her legs are spread, so ideally her cuffed hands will be right above her head.
Put her ankles in the spreader bar. This will open her up, and also begin to put some strain on her legs. Despite the picture at the top of this post, the wife shouldn’t be on her tip-toes unless she’s really up for a challenge.
Give her a kiss and put the blindfold over her eyes.
Wife: Allow yourself to relax; allow your mind to let go and focus on the sensations in your body; fall into a meditative, dissociative state; take deep breaths; try not to talk; convey your pleasure without words. Your only responsibilities are to enjoy the focused attention from your husband and to open yourself up to an orgasm.
Husband: Now that the wife is suspended and bound, it’s time to begin focusing on her pleasure. Husband, let your imagination run wild as you touch and kiss your wife. Your goal isn’t to bring her to climax as fast as possible, but rather to explore every inch of her body and lead her to an intensely pleasurable orgasm over a prolonged period of time. Here are some ideas for what you can do with her, spending one to two minutes on an activity before switching to another.
Intermittent vibration. Use the vibrator on your wife intermittently for one to two minutes at a time, and then remove it. Alternate between the vibrator and the other activities in this list. Gradually increase time with the vibrator and bring your wife to the edge of orgasm without letting her go over until you’re ready.
Kiss her all over. And don’t forget to kiss her lips!
Perform oral sex on her. With her legs spread it should be easy to reach her lady bits. You’ll probably want to focus on this before applying lube — unless you have some flavored lube!
Finger massage. Press the tips of your fingers into her skin and drag them across the surfaces of her body. Spend a while with medium finger pressure, then come back to this activity later with feather-light pressure.
Tickle her. Sexy Corte really dislikes tickling, but maybe your wife will enjoy it!
Rub her g-spot. Curl your fingers and reach inside her to stimulate her g-spot. Doing this while using the vibrator is sure to drive her crazy.
Enter her vagina with your fingers or penis. Tease the opening of her vulva and work towards deeper penetrations on subsequent visits to this activity.
Lick or tease her nipples.
Spank her. You should probably ask if she’s up for this before you surprise her with a spanking while she’s blindfolded!
Rub her thighs. Her thighs will be stressed because of her suspended position, so there will be extra blood-flow to the region; it will feel relieving and comforting if you massage her inner and outer thighs.
Play with her anus. Use a lubricated finger to stimulate her anus. (Be sure to wash your finger off before touching another part of her body with it.)
Hug her. Envelop her body in your arms. Nuzzle her neck with your face. Squeeze her tight.
Talk dirty to her. Whisper sexy fantasies into her ear. Tell her what you’re going to do to her next. Tell her what you want her to do to you. You can do this while you’re applying the vibrator as well.
Put your fingers in her mouth. Have her pretend she’s performing oral sex on your fingers.
Make her beg for an orgasm. Before you let her climax, make her beg for it. Don’t make her guess what to say — tell her what to say.
When you’re ready for your wife to orgasm you’ll both have to ascertain if she will be able to climax while standing in this position. The husband shouldn’t push her into it, but the wife should give it her best effort. If it’s just not going to happen, release the wife from the spreader bar; leave the cuffs and blindfold on, while removing the cuffs from the attachment point. Husband, guide your wife down onto the bed and into whatever position is best for her to orgasm. Do whatever you have to do to fulfill the the promise you made her body!
After you’re both done, remove all the bondage stuff and cuddle for a while. When the time is right, you can talk about what you each liked or didn’t like about the activity, and what you would change if you ever do it again.
As a final note: you can also use this activity as an element of a sexual role-playing scenario like Professor and Student or Bratty Wife. It also works well in a scenario where one of you has been “captured” as a pirate, spy, prisoner, etc.
Do you have any suggestions for other activities to do in this standing o-vation position? Leave a comment!
Since posting Podcast #008: How to Make the Most of the Size You’ve Got we’ve gotten feedback from readers who love deep penetration, and we’ve also received a few questions about positions to use for more depth. It just so happens that Sexy Corte and I have been experimenting with an edge-of-the bed position that is perfect for deep penetration, and that also creates an amazing visual experience for the husband!
The wife perches on the edge of the bed (or other raised surface) and lifts her legs up, pulling her knees towards her chest.
The husband stands facing her and enters.
This position enables extremely deep penetration by pulling the wife’s legs far out of the way and by pushing her pelvis up and forward towards the husband. You may even get deeper than in doggy style! As always with deep positions, the husband will need to be careful not to thrust too forcefully to avoid discomfort for the wife; the wife will likely find deep penetration more enjoyable if she is thoroughly aroused.
Edge-of-the-bed positions are great for a bunch of reasons!
Deep penetration. As we already mentioned, these positions enable the deepest possible penetration of any face-to-face positions.
Access to the wife’s clitoris. These positions don’t stimulate the wife’s clitoris directly, but they do provide easy access for either spouse to use their fingers, thumb, or a vibrator. The wife’s clitoris can be hard to reach in most husband-dominant positions — which makes it hard/impossible for the wife to orgasm — so this feature enables the wife to climax while the husband is in control of the action.
Great visuals of penetration. Men are very visual creatures, and edge-of-the-bed positions create an opportunity for the husband to get a good look at the action as he penetrates his wife and watch the response of her whole body when she climaxes. I find these visuals to be extremely hot, and one of the best features of these positions.
Keep cool in the summer. Sex in the hot months of the year can be sweaty and exhausting, but edge-of-the-bed positions can help you keep cool. You won’t get as hot in these positions as when you’re lying down because your bodies aren’t in full-length contact. We find it much harder to reach orgasm if we overheat.
Access to the wife’s legs and breasts. Because your bodies aren’t pressed together, the husband will have lots of access to the wife’s breasts and legs during sex. Breasts are also easily accessible during wife-on-top positions, but in most positions the wife’s legs aren’t within reach. You might both enjoy having the husband pet and rub the wife’s legs and feet during sex!
Edging marathons. Both spouses are in pretty comfortable positions — standing straight up and lying down — so you should be able to stay on the edge-of-the-bed for a while. The wife can have a relaxing, luxurious, drawn-out experience if the husband goes slowly and focuses his attention on her.
Edge-of-the-bed positions do present one significant challenge that hindered our enjoyment of them for years: what to do with the wife’s legs? There’s nowhere to rest them (since they’re hanging off the bed), and it’s tiring for the either spouse to hold them up for long periods of time. You can take turns, but you’ve also got to pay attention to the wife’s clitoris, and thrusting, etc. Here are a few ideas for keeping the wife’s legs comfortable, but you make need to juggle between them over the course of your encounter.
Husband holds wife’s ankles or knees. Great for a while, but it requires both of the husband’s hands. The wife can stimulate herself while the husband holds her legs; this might work great for you, but Sexy Corte really prefers for me to stimulate her.
Wife holds her own legs up and back. The wife pulls her thighs up to her breasts and holds her knees with her hands. This works well and provides great access for the husband, but it can become tiring for the wife and also make her feel squished or cramped after a while.
Husband leans on wife’s shins with one arm. Similar to above — the husband pushes the wife’s thighs up to her breasts, folds her knees, and then leans forward against her shins with one of his arms to hold her legs. This leaves one of his hands free, but can make the wife feel squished and also negates many of the advantages listed above because their bodies will be pressed together.
Prop the wife’s legs up with something. Theoretically you can put two tall objects on the floor near the edge of the bed for the wife to rest her spread legs/feet on and that don’t block the husband. We’ve never been able to make this work. You’d probably need some sort of birthing table.
Use a bondage strap or rope. This is the approach we just discovered, and it works pretty well as an augmentation to the other techniques described above. Use one of your bondage straps or ropes (which I’m sure you already own!) to hold the wife’s legs up. You can position the strap behind her neck or shoulders, whichever she finds the most comfortable. Both spouses can take turns holding the wife’s legs to relieve the pull of the straps when desired. For example:
Once you’ve mastered the basics, here are some more edge-of-the-bed sex positions to try out. Share some of your tips or let us know what you think in the comments below!
It seems like there’s a lot of interest in bondage these days, and many couples are experimenting with stuff they never would have thought of before. If you’ve never tried bondage you may be wondering what the big deal is — why would anyone want to be restrained during sex?
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Why is sex so good? Kinda like asking, “why is water wet?” But still, if we understand what makes sex good then maybe we can make it even better!
One of the main questions in life is: Why is sex so good? According to a new review paper, it’s because sex — like dance, yoga, and other body-based pleasures — is rhythmic, and that rhythm has a way of uniting and heightening the senses.
Authored by Northwestern University researcher Adam Safron and published in Socioaffective Neuroscience and Psychology, the paper argues that intercourse can be such a magical experience because of “entrainment,” which is a fancy way of saying that it gets your brain, sensory, and bodily systems all rowing in the same sexy direction. What happens in the run-up to orgasm, he argues, is what goes on in most ecstatic experiences (consider how a “beat drops” in your favorite new disco anthem). Rhythmic perception and action lead you to attend more to the stimuli that’s turning you on, leading to greater enjoyment, and greater attendance, making for “further enhancing entrainment, thus creating a positive feedback cycle of deepening sexual absorption,” he writes.
It’s not enough to call this increased arousal or pleasure: A better way to understand the way people can lose their sense of selves during the act of sex is with trance, the same way that you might feel a sense of absorption on a particularly good night of dancing, a particularly strenuous yoga session, a particularly deep meditation, or a particularly satisfying run. “Intensely focusing on immediate sensations — such as those produced by rhythmic stimulation — is likely to reduce the amount of mental capacity available for other things,” Safron writes, like ruminative self-narratives, wondering about what could have been, or generally having your mind someplace other than where you currently are. “Such an experience of sensate focusing and altered self-processing may be most appropriately referred to as a kind of trance state,” he writes. “If this trance occurs in the context of another individual who is similarly absorbed, then it could potentially contribute to feelings of connectedness along with the expansion of self-other boundaries.”
I bolded the part that jumped out at me, and it matches my experience. Sex is best when you are “intensely focusing on immediate sensations” — which is closely related to our posts about the importance of enthusiasm and responsiveness. There’s a feedback loop: in order to have great sex you need to pull your mind away from the mundane considerations of life, and the act of pulling away is self-reinforcing, leading to enhanced focus and even better sex!
So how can you use this information to improve sex with your spouse? In addition to the posts I’ve linked to above, here are a few ways you can focus more intensely during sex:
Sight. Get rid of visual distractions. Unless you’re just playing around you should turn off the television, put away your phones, and lock your door. Focus your eyes and attention on your spouse. You can dim the lights, maintain eye contact, or even wear a blindfold for some power play. Wear something sexy. Do a dance. Keep your bedroom orderly and comfortable to avoid seeing your surroundings as a to-do list while you’re having sex.
Sound. Put on some sensual music, something with a beat! Like the article says above, a good rhythm helps synchronize your bodies and senses. Turn off the baby monitors, silence your phones. Replace the batteries in the #&%&(#@% smoke detector. In my post about sexual responsiveness I talk about how important it is to use words and sounds during sex, so go read that whole post. Moan and groan, cry out, say your spouse’s name, beg for an orgasm.
Smell and taste. Using food in your sexy time can be fun, but it may also be a distraction. If you want to focus intensely on the sexual experience, engage with the taste and smell of your spouse. Bury your face in your spouse’s hair or neck. Kiss deeply. Lick your spouse all over. Use oral sex not only to stimulate your spouse, but also to engage your own senses! During oral sex the attention is usually on the receiver, but try flipping that around: when you’re giving oral sex, focus on absorbing all the sensations that come from being close to your spouse’s sexuality. (Husbands especially: hygiene is important if you want your wife to enjoy your taste and smell.)
Touch. Sex obviously involves a lot of touching, but the touching can often be very goal-oriented: orgasm. However, sex with your spouse isn’t (usually) a race — you can focus your sense of touch more intensely if you just slow down. Revel in touching and being touched all over your bodies. An average human has twenty square feet of skin, so don’t just use your fingers: lips and tongues are obvious, but you can touch anything to anything else. (Check out Body Part Twister for some ideas (automated spinner).) Touch, tickle, massage, tease, and you can learn to build your spouse up to some huge orgasms.
Restraint. One of the reasons that light bondage is fun is that the person being restrained (the receiver) is free to focus completely on his or her sensations. While restrained, the receiver doesn’t need to think about giving pleasure, only receiving it. Being tied up is permission to be the center of attention, even your own attention. The receiver doesn’t have to do anything, just be.
Trust and vulnerability. In order to really lose yourself in a sexual experience you have to trust your spouse enough to let yourself be vulnerable. Your relationship needs to be past the point where you worry about looking right, acting right, or moving right. If you’re worried about impressing or disappointing your spouse, or being awkward, you’re not going to be able to focus on your senses. You each need to be comfortable with your own bodies and sexuality, and you need to respect and cherish each other.
“Losing yourself” doesn’t come naturally to everyone, but I think we can take some intentional steps to eliminate distractions during sex and really focus on the sensations we’re creating with our spouses. If you have any tips to share, please leave a comment!
How would you like a magic button? When you push the button, your husband immediately does what the button says. Not only does he do it, he does it without complaint or acting upset. Now turn it around; what magic button would your husband like? What does he want more of from/with you? If I asked him the top five buttons he would like, how many of them would you guess correctly?
The Duchy has rope bondage tutorials with no nudity or sexual content. If you haven’t yet, check out our post about shibari.
If you were intrigued by our bondage for beginners post then you’re in for a treat! Shibari is an artistic, beautiful, and intimate style of rope bondage that spouses can enjoy when they have a significant amount of time available to invest in a sexual encounter. A quick warning, which may be obvious: if you Google many of the terms in this post you’re likely to see images with nudity. However, it is possible to learn about shibari without seeing all that, and I’m going to link to a few resources that I found to be safe.
(Sexy Corte and I debated over whether or not showing nude mannequins and drawings is acceptable, and we decided yes. Educational resources frequently use drawings or icons to convey sexual information while avoiding naked human flesh, and we think it’s approriate. Shibari is a very visual art, and it would be impossible to describe without any images. If the images bother you, we apologize.)
First of all, I should point out that I’m not an expert on shibari. I’m going to attempt to use the correct terminology and give some tips for how Sexy Corte and I got started, but this is all pretty new to us. Second, make sure you read about basic bondage safety — I can’t cover all that here.
So, why would you want to try Japanese rope bondage?
Beautiful body art. Creating a work of art on you or your spouse’s body is great fun and very empowering. Your bodies are “fearfully and wonderfully made” by God, and shibari gives you a new way to enjoy their beauty and sexuality.
Intimate. Performing the ties takes time, close attention to detail, cooperation, communication, and lots of touching. The spouse being tied doesn’t just stand immobile — the whole process requires (naked!) collaboration. A shibari session can hit every love language: plenty of physical touch, an investment of quality time, service through tying and being tied, words affirming beauty and skill, and even giving of gifts in the form of materials. You and your spouse can emphasize whatever aspects best fit your languages.
Simple. Ok, some of the art pieces you may see online are not simple, but the basic techniques are easy to learn and build from. The materials you need to get started (see below) are inexpensive and easily available.
Power dynamic. As with most bondage, the dynamic of domination and submission can be as big or small an element as you desire, both during the tying and after. The basic shibari ties (see below) don’t necessarily restrain the movement of the spouse being tied, but they can form the foundation for restraining ties if desired.
Creative. The image at the top of the post comes from 18Seiben’s Deviant Art gallery, and he has tons of other safe images to inspire you. There’s really no limit to the designs and patterns you can create, even with very simple techniques. Once you grasp the basics, it isn’t hard to look at a single image and consider how you might create something similar.
The materials required to get started are minimal. First, of course, is rope.
“Shibari rope”. You can find “shibari rope” online that’s extremely expensive and unnecessary; don’t buy it. You can get great rope at your local home improvement store for only a few dollars. Shibari purists seem to prefer natural hemp rope, but we’ve gotten along fine with nylon and MFP (cheaper and less scratchy).
Default length and thickness. To get started, buy a few pieces of rope that are 1/4-inch thick and 25 feet long. Length and thickness will eventually depend on the ties you plan to do.
Longer. We also have a 50-foot rope — longer ropes can be useful for some designs, but are harder to work with because you have to pull all that length through, over and over.
Thicker. Some 3/8-inch thick rope can also be useful for ties that actually bear weight (greater width means the rope doesn’t bite into skin as much), but it’s harder to knot.
Additional supplies:
Safety scissors. Just in case you need to cut free immediately. Medical safety scissors have blunt tips that make it easy to cut rope without poking skin.
Relaxing music. Unlike most of your sex music, shibari really lends itself to a peaceful soundtrack. Think classical. Maybe Sexy Corte can offer some suggestions later.
Ok, so you’ve got your supplies and you’re ready to get started! Now what? The first tie we did is a simple breast harness called a shinju, which means “binding the pearls”. The term can refer to many different styles of breast bindings, which generally turn out something like this.
Here’s a three-minute video that will walk you through a simple shinju.
The shinju is a lot of fun and really highlights the wife’s breasts! Once you’ve completed the tie, we recommend progressing to a face-to-face sexual position with the wife upright so as to best enjoy her breasts, such as cowgirl or sex on a chair. The shinju can also serve as the foundation for a variety of arm restraints, like this.
After the shinju, you can move on to a full body harness called a karada, which means “binding the body”. As with the shinju, there are many ways to create a karada, and 18Seiben’s gallery will give you a taste. Here’s video that shows one simple karada.
And here’s an image of a karada that illustrates the process (click for full-size).
These two ties are about as far as we’ve gotten ourselves, but we’ve got a million ideas we’d still like to try. For example, both the shinju and karada can be worn secretly under winter clothes! Once you know the basics it’s easy to visualize how to create more intricate ties, and working through the trial-and-error of achieving your vision is extremely intimate. Our next “advanced” project will be a rope corset.
Finally, some resources:
The Duchy has rope bondage guides that show no skin or sexual content
BDSMGeek’s YouTube playlist of safe shibari tutorials, also with no nudity
If you’ve ever done any rope bondage with your spouse, or are interested in trying, leave a comment!
Sexy Corte and I have been inching our way through the Harry Potter movies in the evenings after the kids go to bed. We both enjoy the movies and the books, but SC is a super-fan. The movies are entertaining but confusing, and after we shut off the television it seems I’ve always got a million questions to ask SC about the series while we are getting ready for bed. So, I figured, why not make a sex game out of it?
I found some Harry Potter trivia on the internet (not hard to do!) and picked out a bunch of questions. If Harry Potter isn’t your thing, pick something else. Maybe Star Wars trivia for the husband? Bible trivia? Civil War history? Prepare the questions (and answers) in advance and print them out or put them in a document on your phone/tablet.
In addition to the trivia questions, I gathered the rest of the required toys. When I’m planning to do something elaborate, especially something that involves restraints, I try to make sure that all the toys are prepared and positioned in advance so that we don’t lose momentum while we’re playing. In this case, the toys were simple: wand vibrator and egg vibrator.
Then I stripped SC down and tied her near the edge of the bed with her legs spread using our under-mattress restraint system (which is always prepared for use). I intended to use a blindfold, but it turned out to be more fun to watch her face. Once I had SC tied down I applied the wand vibrator and explained the rules.
Tie, Tease, Trivia Rules.
I apply the vibrator to you and ask you trivia questions. If the husband is the contestant, the wife can use her hand and mouth to stimulate him. The goal is to provide constant, low-level stimulation to tease the contestant while she tries to focus on the questions.
When you get one right, I go down on you. This is the motivation for the contestant to stay focused on her task. The frequent swapping between vibrator and mouth drove SC crazy, along with the tip of my finger teasing penetration. If the husband is the contestant, the wife can use both her mouth and lady bits to reward correct answers.
When you get one wrong…. I had considered using ice to penalize incorrect answers, but decided against it. Your mileage may vary, depending on the temperament of your contestant. When SC got one wrong I feigned great disappointment, shook my head, and ran the tips of my fingers along her inner thighs. I’d ramp up her stimulation and then remove it briefly, to her great frustration.
You may not orgasm until you score 10 points. Ramp up the stimulation and remind her that she isn’t allowed to come yet. Make light conversation and push her to the edge while you slowly peruse your set of questions. Make her beg for the next question. “Do you want an easy one or a hard one?” Make her keep score. “How many points do you have now? I forget. Are you sure?” Award bonus points and extra licking when she earns it, and take a point and stimulation away if she misses an easy one. Take your time.
Eventually, you win. When you’re ready to end the game, tell her that the questions are over. Ask her how many points she earned. Ramp up the simulation. “Do you think you’ve earned an orgasm?” Make her say yes, she’s earned it. Praise her performance under pressure. “You did great, sweetie. I think you earned an orgasm. Go ahead and get it.” Then give it to her.
“You must think I’m a huge dork,” Sexy Corte laughed at the beginning of the game. Afterwards she asked, “Do you think you can find more Harry Potter questions?”
In our bondage for beginners post we first mentioned the under-the-mattress restraint system and we got a few questions about it, so here’s some more information about why it’s great and how to use it. The banner photo doesn’t show how it’s installed, so here’s a diagram:
There are a few key features that will make such a system one of your most-used sex toys.
Easy to install. You have to lift your mattress and then shuffle the straps into place, but it’s once-and-done. After it’s installed, that’s pretty much it. Unlike many other restraints, you don’t need a headboard or bed posts.
Concealed. When you’re not using it, the cuffs can be tucked under the mattress and the system is invisible. You can show off your room to visitors or let your kids play without worrying that they’ll notice anything unusual.
Convenient. The system doesn’t need to be set up every time you play, and you don’t have to plan ahead. If the urge strikes you while you’re in the middle of the action, just reach under the mattress and grab a cuff.
Adaptable. The diagram shows the straps wrapping over the top and bottom edge of the mattress, but the system works equally well if you pull the straps over the sides. It just depends how you want to stretch and restrain your spouse: more length-wise or more spread-eagle.
Adjustable. The lengths of the straps can be easily adjusted to enable a variety of positions. Most systems come with removable cuffs as well.
Effective. It does exactly what you’d expect: holds wrists and ankles in place. If you want to hold knees open, make sure your cuffs are big enough.
So what positions you use the straps for? Here are a few ideas.
Spread-eagle is the most obvious position, either face-up or face-down. If the husband is restrained face-up the wife can easily have her way with him; if the wife is restrained, face-up is awesome for foreplay and teasing, and face-down is easier for sex.
Arms above head. For face-to-face sex with the wife restrained, it’s convenient to set her ankles free after foreplay but keep her arms above her head. This let’s her legs and hips get into a good position while still restricting her movement.
Arms out, legs up. The straps are easy to reposition, so with the wife in a face-up position you can pull her arms out straight and then lift her legs up. This position is always amazing for deep penetration, and adding the restraints puts the husband in complete control.
Doggy style. Almost the reverse of the position above. Put the wife on her knees and then pull her arms down between her legs and put her face on the mattress. Cuff her ankles and wrists. You can criss-cross the straps to hold her legs together — attach the left wrist to the right strap and the right wrist to the left strap.
Pillow under the hips. Pillows can be put under the restrained spouse’s hips, whether it’s the husband or wife, face-up or face-down. The pillow can can be used to improve access, penetration, and enable angles that are hard to do when laying flat.
And don’t forget your blindfolds, vibrators, and other toys!
Have you ever used an under-mattress restraint system? Got any tips to share with our readers?