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Should I Tan My Balls? 1

Apparently ball-tanning is a thing now?

We’ve written about testicular hygiene and shaving, but the idea of tanning my balls is new to me. What’s the supposed benefit of ball-tanning?

One hypothesis is that red light helps mitochondria produce more ATP, and that this helps the Leydig cells in the testicles to produce more testosterone. Another hypothesis centers around vitamin D, which some studies have shown is low in men who also have low testosterone.

But there are problems with these ideas. To name one obvious one: vitamin D isn’t produced specifically in scrotal skin. You can increase yours by sunning any body part you choose, or simply by eating more food that contains vitamin D, such as fatty fish.

And when it comes to the effects of red light on mitochondria, this may be true—in skin cells. The testicles are internal organs, and light doesn’t penetrate skin by more than a few millimeters tops. There are light therapy treatments that work on the skin, but there’s not really a plausible way for your testes to increase their production of testosterone just because there’s light shining on the skin of the scrotum.

There probably isn’t medical benefit to sunning your balls, but it probably isn’t harmful either (as long as you avoid burns, of course) and might feel good.

The rest of the morning, my crotch felt warm. Alive. So I did it again. Glancing out my office window to make sure the lawnmower guy wasn’t tooling around in the grass, I pulled down my drawers and bathed myself in the heavenly, warm, tingly glow, this time for eight minutes.

That night, my wife and I made love. Admittedly, I felt – well – a unique heavenly, warm, tingly glow in my crotch. Nice.

Two days later, I waited until the evening, then wandered downstairs. I rubbed my hands together, took a deep breath, and flipped my JOOVV on. I called my mom to see how her day was going mom (she had no clue what was going on below the phone). Ten minutes. I read a blog post. Fifteen minutes. My crotch grew more and more warm, but in a pleasant, day-at-the-beach sort of way. I finished an email. Twenty minutes. Mission complete.

That night was date night, and I was a rock star.

So ball-tanning is probably no more silly than most other forms of home medicine! What do you think? How do you pamper your balls?

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Testosterone Affects Women Too 2

Everyone knows that testosterone has a significant effect on men, but many people don’t realize that T levels affect women also. Most women have probably never had their testosterone measured during a routine blood test.

As the primary male sex hormone, it plays a leading role in the sexual development of guys. But folks often overlook the role it plays in female sexuality. Yes, women have testosterone, too, though much less of it — and it exerts a far different pull, new research suggests.

“It was quite surprising that the link with masturbation was stronger among women than men,” said study leader Wendy Macdowall of the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine, in the United Kingdom. “And that among women we saw no link with aspects of partnered sex.”

[Women] with high testosterone were more likely to have had a same-sex relationship at some point. They also masturbated more often — and more recently.

High T was also linked to more solo sex for guys. But the masturbation connection was notably stronger among women, the study found.

Do high T levels cause a woman to masturbate, or vice versa? Unknown. The researchers suggest that masturbation is a “truer” measure measure of sexual desire than sex with a partner, because it’s less likely to be initiated by someone else. This suggests that higher T levels can increase a woman’s libido.

The Mayo Clinic says that the evidence in favor of testosterone supplementation for women for the purpose of increasing libido is limited, so it’s not clear if there’s any clear way to act on the research findings above. For women, it might be worth getting your testosterone checked when you have your next routine blood test.

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Olympic "Anti-Sex" Beds for Athletes 3

Apparently Olympic athletes in Tokyo are being given recyclable beds made from cardboard… that may not be suitable for horizontal gymnastics.

Rumors have circulated that the eco-friendly beds are designed to collapse under the weight of any more than one occupant in order to discourage sex amid rising cases of COVID-19.

American distance runner and Olympic medalist Paul Chelimo added fuel to the fire by speculating the beds were constructed for “avoiding intimacy” in a tweet over the weekend.

“Beds to be installed in Tokyo Olympic Village will be made of cardboard, this is aimed at avoiding intimacy among athletes,” Chelimo claimed. “Beds will be able to withstand the weight of a single person to avoid situations beyond sports.”

But other athletes claim that the beds are sturdy.

On Sunday, Irish gymnast Rhys McClenaghan filmed himself repeatedly jumping on a bed inside the Tokyo Olympic Village to disprove the claim.

“In today’s episode of fake news at the Olympic Games, the beds are meant to be ‘anti-sex’,” McClenaghan says as he steps on top of the bed. “They’re made out of cardboard yes, but apparently they’re meant to break at any sudden movements,” the gymnast continues as he vigorously jumps up and down.

“It’s fake. Fake news,” McClenaghan concludes[.]

Most people don’t have sex by vigorously jumping up and down, so this test seems inconclusive. Did McClenaghan attempt any lateral movements? Hopefully someone will get to the bottom of this before any athletes are injured.

For more on this topic, check out How to Pick the Best Mattress for Sex.

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How to Pray For Our Political Leaders 4

In America you can vote for President once every four years, but you can pray for our President every single day. Whoever wins the election will need your prayers. So how should you pray?

First of all, then, I urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made for all people, for kings and all who are in high positions, that we may lead a peaceful and quiet life, godly and dignified in every way. This is good, and it is pleasing in the sight of God our Savior, who desires all people to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth.

1 Timothy 2:1-4
  1. Pray for peace and quiet. Peace is an exception in human history, and we shouldn’t take it for granted. Most humans have lived under the constant threat of violence. Pray that our political leaders will pursue peace.
  2. Pray for a godly and dignified life. Pray that our political leaders will protect and support our freedom to live lives pleasing to God, and that they’ll recognize and respect the imago dei in each individual.
  3. Pray that people will hear God’s Word and be saved. God’s ultimate purpose in this world isn’t political, it’s spiritual. Pray that our political leaders will do nothing to hinder the reach of God’s Word. Pray that Christ’s church will take every opportunity to share the Gospel. Pray that the Holy Spirit will “convict the world concerning sin and righteousness and judgment”.
  4. Pray with perseverance and thanksgiving. Do not give up on God if he seems slow to answer. Persevere in prayer. We are commanded to cultivate a spirit of thanksgiving in our prayers, so do not allow a “bitter root” to take hold in you.

Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving. At the same time, pray also for us, that God may open to us a door for the word, to declare the mystery of Christ, on account of which I am in prison— that I may make it clear, which is how I ought to speak.

Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time. Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.

Colossians 4:2-6

Time is shorter than ever. If you don’t have time to pray every day for our leaders, then you certainly don’t have time to be reading and posting about politics all day on social media.

(Note: Please do not leave partisan comments on this post; they will be deleted.)

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Sperm Swim in Spirals 5

Here’s a fun tongue-twister of story for Friday morning: scientists just discovered that human sperm swim with a spiral motion, not by swishing side-to-side.

Using state-of-the-art 3D microscopy, a piezoelectric device, and mathematics, researchers in Mexico discovered how sperm really move: They spin, with a wonky asymmetrical wiggle. The researchers reported their discovery today in the journal Science Advances.

“It’s 2020 and we all thought we knew how sperm actually swim, and we couldn’t have been more wrong,” says Hermes Gadêlha, a senior lecturer in the Department of Engineering Mathematics at the University of Bristol. Gadêlha collaborated on the project with colleagues at the Image and Computer Vision Laboratory at the National Autonomous University of Mexico.

Sperm Swim in Spirals 6

I have no idea how this new knowledge can benefit your marriage, but you might have fun with your spouse trying to say “sperm swim in spirals” five times fast.

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Sex in the News: Tortoises, Bananas, Fireworks 7

I haven’t been able to figure out how to turn these weird news items into blog posts of their own, so I’m going to share them here just to get them off my to-do list.

“This playboy tortoise had so much sex he saved his entire species.”

A womanizing tortoise whose rampant sex life may have single-handedly saved his entire species from extinction has retired from his playboy lifestyle, returning to the wild with his mission accomplished. Diego’s unstoppable libido was credited as a major reason for the survival of his fellow giant tortoises on Espanola, part of the Galapagos Islands, after being shipped over from the San Diego Zoo as part of a breeding program. When he started his campaign of promiscuity, there were just two males and 12 females of his species alive on the island. But the desirable shell-dweller had so much sex he helped boost the population to over 2,000. The Galapagos National Parks service believe the 100-year-old tortoise is the patriarch of around 40% of that population.

“Not if you were the last tortoise on earth!” Good work Diego, you’re an inspiration to us all.

“Doctors beg men not to masturbate with banana peels.”

Doctors have warned horny young men to refrain from using banana peels to masturbate — the latest bizarre sex trend circulating on social media.

“It’s the closet thing to a blowjob,” wrote one randy Redditor, who claims “he’s been doing it for years.”

However, Dr. Diana Gill of prescription service Doctor-4-U cautions against the perverse practice. “You could develop a rash and sores on the penis which can be painful and might lead to infection,” Gill told the Sun. [snip]

Gill’s not the only naysayer. One Reddit user recounted a harrowing, cautionary tale where he used a banana skin to masturbate and allegedly ended up “falling in the mess I made, hit my head on the toilet and barely lived to tell the tale.”

Wives, if you find your husband unconscious in a pile of banana peels you might need to have a talk with him.

“Fireworks: Nearly Half Of Americans Had Best Sex Of Their Lives In 2019, Survey Finds.”

Incredibly, 2019 is close to being over, which means it’s time again to look back and reflect on the year that was. A recent survey of 2,000 sexually active American adults asked respondents to recount their sexual experiences in 2019, and found that a significant portion (44%) had the best sex of their lives this year. Moreover, 47% said their sex life was far better in 2019 than it was in 2018.

Apparently, this past year was one of sexual experimentation for many Americans: one in six tried phone sex for the first time, and 29% used their first sex toy. In fact, according to the research, which was commissioned by Pure Romance, 38% of respondents became more adventurous sexually this past year. Another 20% had sex in a car for the first time, and one in six had their first experience with sexual roleplaying.

We get a lot of emails asking us about phone sex, but it’s not something we do much since Sexy Corte and I are together most of the time. We’ve posted about almost everything else in this article! We also asked our readers to share their best sexual experiences of 2019, and if you haven’t shared yet then go leave a comment.

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Ideal Male Bodies from History 9

Most everyone agrees that the female body is more aesthetically pleasing than the male, and women are much more commonly portrayed as reifications of beauty than are men. (Perhaps the most famous exception is Michelangelo’s David, above.) Men aren’t generally depicted for their beauty, but perhaps we can learn a bit about the historical “ideal male body” by examining some artwork of men who were at the top of the social hierarchy for another reason: martial prowess.

Redditor PartyMoses writes about depictions of men in 15th century fencing manuals.

I’m going to take some time to talk about a man named Paulus Kal. Kal was a fencing master who wrote a treatise on the knightly arts, and had a long career as a knight in various capacities, served some civic functions for Nuremberg, and was sworn in service to a couple of dukes. In the 1480s (probably), he wrote his treatise, which contained a fair amount of art.

We think Kal depicted himself in the middle here, wearing the red/pink suit. He’s helping a knight (right) prepare for a duel. Take a look at Kal and a look at the anonymous knight for a moment. Kal doesn’t look the way we think of as “fit” today. He has a noticable belly, no definition of arm muscles, stout legs. He looks very similar in other images, even from (possibly) different artists. Now take a look at the arming knight: again, no muscle definition, the man in fact looks quite thin. It’s the same in most of the images throughout the treatise.

Ideal Male Bodies from History 10

Aside from these fencers, PartyMoses also points to “Kal’s Birdman”:

I have eyes like a hawk, so you do not deceive me.
I have a heart like a lion, so I strive forward.
I have feet like a hind, so I can spring to and fro.

Ideal Male Bodies from History 11

Obviously the ideal man is not an exquisite corpse or a nightmarish fusing of animal with human, but we are supposed to understand the animal-like features of the ideal fencer. Eyes that can’t be deceived, courage that won’t falter, quick feet. But look at the body of this ideal man. No muscle tone, nearly anywhere. An exaggerated waist even with a bit of a gut, thin arms, tapering legs.

(Follow the link above for commentary and many more pictures.)

Did 15th-century women swoon over these emaciated birdmen? Unfortunately I couldn’t find any depictions of men created by women of that era… maybe someone more proficient with art history would know the answer.

Women: are you familiar with any artwork that portrays an attractive male figure? Leave a comment and let us know.

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4 Ways a Wife Can Increase Her Husband's Life Expectancy 12

Although we’re all living longer, the life expectancy for men remains about five years shorter than for women.

4 Ways a Wife Can Increase Her Husband's Life Expectancy 13

We all know about the obvious things a man can do to increase his life expectancy: stay fit, don’t smoke, eat right, and avoid dangerous jobs. But those are boring!

Wives, I’m sure you’re wondering… what can you do to help your husband live longer? Well, here’s an interesting list of six items that research indicates will boost male longevity, and four of them directly depend on your assistance!

Stare At Women’s Breasts
Men’s eyes tend to wander from a woman’s face down to her chest. Previously, it’s been reported men who stare at women’s breasts tend to live longer, but this has been debunked. However, Men’s Health provided a scientific explanation for why ogling at breasts could boost longevity for men.
They explained staring at breasts or looking at cute animals benefit a man’s health by creating a positive mindset.

Wait… this has been debunked? Then why is “stare at women’s breasts” even on the list? I know that Sexy Corte’s boobs make be feel better. Let’s leave this one in the “maybe” category, mostly because we’d like it to be true.

Have Lots Of Sex
If men need an excuse to have more sex, look no further than doing it for your health’s sake. A study in BMJfound sex could have a protective effect on a man’s health. Mortality risk was reduced by as much as 50 percent and life expectancy increased by three to eight years in the group who reported more orgasms.

We’re proponents of daily sex, and the more you have sex the better it gets. There’s also evidence that sex boosts women’s immune systems and helps you sleep better. There’s really no downside to more sex with your spouse.

Get Married
Men, marriage, and mortality are the three m’s that go together. Men who have spouses tend to live longer than their single counterparts. A survey of over 127,000 American adults found men who marry after age 25 get more protection than those who get hitched at a younger age, and the longer a man stays married, the greater his survival advantage compared to his single counterparts.
Researchers have questioned whether healthy men are more likely to marry than men with health problems, but unhealthy men actually marry earlier, are less likely to divorce, and more likely to remarry after divorce or being widowed than healthy men. Others wonder if marriage is linked to better health, or just living with another person provides the benefit. However, it seems to be both — people living with unmarried partners fare better in health than those living alone, but men with spouses tend to have the best health.

If you’re reading our blog then you’re probably already married! Good job — now stick with it.

Become A Parent
Men who get married and become parents are more likely to live longer than their childless peers. A recent study in the Journal of Epidemiology & Community Health found men and women with at least one child had lower death risks than their childless counterparts. When parents reached age 60, the difference in life expectancy was two years for men and 1.5 years for women.

For bonus longevity points, learn how to keep your darn kids from interfering with your sex life! Lock your door, have sex during and after pregnancy, don’t co-sleep with your kids, put your kids to bed on time, and be prepared for sex on vacation.

So there you have it: wife, you have a critical role to play in your husband’s longevity.

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For Female Arousal, Excitement Is Better than Relaxation 14

Dr. Cindy M. Meston from the University of Texas at Austin explains that the key to female sexual arousal is excitement, not relaxation.

“For years we were told, ‘Have a bubble bath, calm down, listen to relaxing music, do deep breathing exercises, chill out before sex,'” she says.

“But my research shows the opposite, that you actually want to get women in an active state.

“So, you can run around the block with your partner and get them to chase you around the block, or watch a scary movie together, ride a roller-coaster together, even a good comedy act. If you really get laughing, you’re going to have a sympathetic activation response.”

Meston is talking about the sympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for subconscious muscle contractions that get us ready for the flight or fight mode, like heart rate and blood pressure. She has found that if this system is activated before sex it will help women respond more intensely and more quickly.

Paul Byerly at The XY Code has a great story about excitement:

I recall a time when Lori thought I had fallen off a cliff (I had not). We went home and had really good sex. Now I know the reason for that was the adrenaline running through her system. Likewise, this is why teenage boys used to like to take a girl to a scary movie; their chances of something sexual in the back seat of the car were much better after such a movie.

We write a lot about games, activities, and novelty on our blog because they create excitement! Wives tend to be sexually responsive and usually don’t even realize when they’re becoming aroused!

Men’s subjective ratings of arousal were in agreement with their body’s level of sexual arousal about 66 percent of the time, while women’s were in line only about 26 percent of the time.

“The general pattern that I have seen in my laboratory is that women experience a genital response but do not report feeling sexually aroused,” Chivers told LiveScience.

Husbands and wives should both ponder that statistic for a while: a woman’s body often gets aroused before her mind does, and she won’t even notice.

Do you want to kick up the intensity of your sex life? Here are a few ideas from previous posts:

How do you get your sympathetic nervous system revved up? Leave a comment and let us know!

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