Maybe you look like Michelangelo’s David or maybe you “do the best with what you’ve got” — either way, the time and energy you invest into health and fitness can pay off in your marriage. Obviously there’s more to a good marriage than fitness, but fitness is the topic of this post. Consider 1 Corinthians 6:19-20,
Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.
I (generally) like this list from T-Nation, so let’s consider their “8 Reasons to Marry a Fit Person” from the perspective of married people who want to be the best version of themselves for their spouse.
1 Fit Marriages Are Less Likely To Become Fat Divorces
Google one of those “Top 10 Causes of Divorce” lists. Money and infidelity issues are always at the top but look further down the list. What do you see? Weight gain.
When relationship columnist David Eddie scoured anonymous relationship-help forums, he found something surprising. Most of the people who were unhappy with their rapidly expanding spouses were women. Here’s an example:
“I love my husband, but he’s become a tubby hubby and refuses to do anything about it. Now I’m not attracted to him, and I’m thinking of leaving.”
Ouch. Well, check out “Do You Even Lift?” and “It’s Important To Stay Skinny For My Husband” for some tips. Don’t hold yourself to an unreasonable standard — just put in the work to be the best version of yourself that you can be.
2 Fit Men Make More Money
Women are often criticized for wanting to marry a man who either has money or has the kind of drive that would help him make money in the future. It’s an unfair criticism.
Husbands are usually the primary source of income, especially after kids come along. And since arguments over money (or the lack thereof) are the number two indicator of an impending divorce, not marrying a lazy guy is a perfectly acceptable and smart criterion for husband pickin’.
We hardly ever write about money, but here’s one post that touches on the topic: “Science and the Bible Agree: More Money Won’t Make You Happier”. If you don’t have enough money to meet your family’s basic needs, then money will make you happier. Beyond that, it doesn’t seem like money is nearly as important as we think it is. I don’t think I’d put in effort to get fit just to (possibly) earn more money.
3 Fit People Know How To Stay Fit
Most people gain some weight after marriage, even fit people. That’s not a marriage ender, of course, but when one spouse loses the weight and the other doesn’t, it can lead to problems.
Anyone can learn how to get and stay fit. Being fit is simple, but it’s not easy. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 says, “Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.” Like point #5 says below, we should be motivating each other to be our best.
4 Sex Is More Frequent and More Satisfying
The good news is that several studies show that fit people have more sex than unfit people. And married people have MORE sex than single people, despite all that right-swiping that singles do.
Fit people usually feel better about themselves and are more likely to get naked. All their parts work better, too. When you exercise regularly, all the healthy hormones (testosterone, dopamine) are ramped up while the trickier hormones (cortisol) are tamped down if you program wisely.
In one study titled “Sexual Desirability and Sexual Performance: Does Exercise and Fitness Really Matter?” the authors concluded:
“Exercise frequency and physical fitness enhance attractiveness and increase energy levels, both of which make people feel better about themselves. Those who exercise are more likely to experience a greater level of satisfaction and a positive perception of self. Moreover, those who feel better about themselves may perceive they are more sexually desirable and may perform better sexually. The majority of individuals who are regularly physically active are healthier, and perhaps healthier individuals may be more willing and able to have sex.”
We’ve written a lot about sexual frequency and sexual quality, and there’s no doubt that exercise is great for sex. Sleep is at least as important as exercise for fitness and sexual satisfaction.
5 A Fit Spouse is the World’s Best Motivator
You’ve heard the saying, “We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with.” Well, your spouse is your number one peer in that group of five. And if they’re serious about staying healthy and strong, that kind of peer pressure, even unspoken, is a very good thing.
A fit spouse keeps you on your toes. You may hit the gym a little more often, choose foods a little more wisely, or just be influenced by your spouse’s healthy behaviors.
Good habits and bad habits are both contagious. Hebrews 10:24 says, “Let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works” — and that doesn’t mean to nag or complain! Encourage and build up your spouse, and allow yourself to be encouraged by your spouse in return. Proverbs 27:17 says, “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.”
6 Fit Spouses Live Longer
You’re in this for life, right? ‘Till death do you part? Wanting to grow old together on the porch and all that good stuff?
Well, all that’s kinda wrecked if your spouse gets heart disease in their 50’s or type 2 diabetes, well, any time. Choose a spouse that does their best to make it to that front porch swing with you.
Interestingly, it seems that a wife has a particularly strong influence on her husband’s life expectancy.
7 Fit People Are Usually Happier
Want a happy marriage? Marry a happy person. Sure beats being married to someone who’s perpetually bitter, angry, or sad.
Studies show that fit people are generally happier. Even if they struggle with depression or down times, they have the tools (exercise, good food, and good supplements) to alleviate or minimize it.
Our minds are bodies were created together. Sometimes we Christians have a tendency to view our bodies as evil or corrupted, and our minds as good or spiritual. This is wrong. God created both, and he will redeem both in the resurrection. We feel good when our minds are aligned with God’s will — through prayer, study, and fellowship — and we can find similar satisfaction when we align our bodies. Just like Bible study prepares the mind to serve, physical exercise prepares the body.
8 Shared Passion = Marriage Longevity
Australian researchers wanted to find out the key to long marriages. After studying thousands of happily married geriatrics, they concluded that it all comes down to shared experiences.
Going to the gym, being active outdoors, and preparing healthy meals that you eat together are all shared experiences. And since fresh sweat does have some mild aphrodisiacal properties, the couple who plays together often gets frisky together.
The shared experience of exercise is a huge benefit to me and Sexy Corte. We both love to run, and running together is one of our best times. If you’re struggling to exercise, find an activity that you can do with your spouse and you’ll get a double-benefit from the time invested!
If you want to improve your marriage and your sex life, you should consider improving your fitness together. What’s your experience? Leave us a comment below.
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