This post is also available as a podcast: Podcast #013: How to Admire Your Husband’s Sexuality

Men often have as much body shame as women do, even though it’s not as acceptable for a man to admit it. As I wrote in my previous post about making the most of the size you’ve got, it’s common for a man to worry that his penis isn’t as big, attractive, hard, or potent as it “should” be — according to the standards society imposes through the media. Even aside from pornography — which is a whole problem of its own — simple family sitcoms make frequent penis jokes at the expense of husbands and imply that wives crave a body type that most men don’t possess and can’t attain.

So, the previous post gave some practical tips for husbands and wives to make the most of the penis they share, and in this post I’m going to give some suggestions for how a wife can build her husband up by admiring his penis. Even if your husband has never expressed any anxiety about his penis, I assure you that he takes his member very seriously. Even more than his semen, a man’s penis represents his male power, virility, and essence. These ideas are guaranteed to make your husband more confident, happy, and affectionate (in and out of bed).

• Don’t be afraid of it. Hopefully your husband is keeping his penis clean (and possibly shaving), so don’t be afraid to get right up close. If you’re uncomfortable around his penis then he’s definitely going to notice and feel self-conscious. The primary way to overcome this aversion is to familiarize yourself with it, whether in a sexual context or otherwise. Look at his penis, touch it, handle it, talk about it, play with it, get to know it. Make friends with your husband’s penis — it’s your penis, too!
• Physical touch. This probably goes without saying, but your husband loves it when you touch his penis. Don’t touch it reluctantly or hesitantly — be enthusiastic! Use your hands and mouth, of course, but don’t hesitate to use other body parts, too. Your face, neck, breasts, stomach, and butt are all very intimate areas that you can rub against your husband’s penis to show your desire for it. “Can I play with you while we watch TV?” will send your husband through the roof.
• Admire its physicality. Tell your husband how much you love his penis. Be sincere — what do you like about it? This is a super-easy way for a wife to initiate sex. Examples:
  • “I love how you fill me up”
  • “I love how you feel inside me”
  • “You’re so hard!”
  • “You taste so good”
  • “It feels so good when you slide into me”
  • “Just looking at you gets me so wet”
  • “You’re making my mouth water!”
  • Important note: don’t tell him his penis is big unless it actually is; men know, and if you lie about this it will simply undermine everything else you say.
• Ask for it before sex. Just like women, men want to be wanted. Even if the husband initiates sex most of the time (which seems common), the wife can validate him by expressing her desire for his penis. Here are a few examples:
  • “I need you inside me right now”
  • “My body is aching for you”
  • “Go slow, I want to feel every inch of you”
  • “Please fill me up!”
  • “I can’t wait to wrap my lips around you”
  • “I’ve been wanting to taste you all day”
  • “I can’t wait to swallow you”
• Responsiveness during sex. That link can give you some general tips for responding to your spouse during sex. Here are some ways to specifically respond to your husband’s penis:
  • Act like it hurts a little. Not enough to make him stop or worry, but a little moaning and groaning when he enters will go a long way. If he hesitates, just tell him, “No, don’t stop! It feels amazing!”
  • Moaning and groaning in general are sexy. I’m not suggesting that a wife should act deceptively, simply that you should verbalize the pleasure you’re feeling.
  • “You’re so big!” — again, if he is.
  • “I feel so complete when you’re in me”
  • “You feel so warm inside me”
  • “You feel so hard inside me”
  • “Pound me harder!”
  • “My body feels so full!”
  • “Yes! I’ve needed this all day”
  • “I love feeling you so deep in me”
  • “I can feel you shooting inside me”
• Show appreciation after sex. Tell your husband how much you enjoyed his penis.
  • “I can’t believe that fit inside me” — again, if plausible.
  • “I’m going to be sore for a while after that!”
  • “I can’t wait to get you inside me again”
  • “Let me lick you off”
  • “You hit me just right inside”
  • “I feel so empty inside without you in there”
• Enjoy his semen. Read that link for details. Accepting your husband’s semen goes right along with enjoying his penis.

Wives, I predict that if you use one of these ideas each day you’ll have a huge positive effect on your husbands!

Do you have a tip to share? Husbands, is there anything you like to hear from your wife? Leave a comment below.