Favorite Gift of 2022: Sexy Coupon Book 1

My favorite Christmas gift this year was a sexy coupon book from Sexy Corte. The booklet has 27 coupons, including three blanks. One of my goals for 2023 is to use all the coupons before the end of the year!

I used the first coupon last night for a baby oil massage. I’ve never been oiled-up all over my body before, and it was a pretty luxurious feeling. Sexy Corte oiled herself first — which was fun to watch — and then oiled me by rubbing her body all over mine — no hands allowed. When we were both dangerously slippery we had sex and then took a bubble bath together. 10/10 — would recommend.

What makes a coupon book such a great gift?

  • Anticipation. It’s like telling your spouse, “look at all the sexy things I’ve got in store for you!” Every coupon is something fun to look forward to.
  • Potential. The three blank coupons are full of potential! It’s fun just to imagine what I might want to write on there. There are only three coupons, but I can think of 100 things I could write. It’s like I’ve got three wishes from my own sexy genie!
  • Initiative. I love that Sexy Corte took the initiative to give me the coupons, and thereby gave me “permission” to take initiative and use the coupons when I want to. Even without the coupons I could have asked her to do any of these things, but now I feel confident asking for them because she has intentionally given me this power.

You can find dozens of sexy coupon books on Etsy and elsewhere, or you can make your own! If you’re having trouble thinking of ideas, ask your spouse what he or she wants, browse our blog, or use the random sex adventure generator.

(The image for this post is from the SNL skit “Dick in a Box”.)

Have you ever given or received a sexual coupon book? What was your experience with it?

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"I know how you think. You like to summon me." 2

After I wrote the post Write Your Sexual To-Do List On Your Spouse’s Body Sexy Corte recognized something. She said, “I know how you think. You like to summon me.” She’s right.

Since then, we’ve been playing with this idea a bit. The thought of having Sexy Corte at my beck-and-call really turns me on, but she’s a very busy lady and highly conscientious. She doesn’t want to drop what she’s doing to fool around at my whim.

Here are some things that have worked for us. You can obviously reverse all these tips if the wife is summoning the husband. Remember: this is playful and should be enjoyable for both spouses.

  • Discuss in advance. If I’m interested in playing this game during the day I’ll float it with Sexy Corte in the morning. If she’s in a playful and happy mood, then great; if she has a frantic or frustrating day ahead of her, then nope. You can’t read each others’ minds, so you need to communicate.
  • Set clear expectations. “Come down to my office” is pretty vague. Without some context Sexy Corte might come downstairs to review bills or put away groceries rather than to fool around. “Come to my office and show me your boobs” is more direct and clear.
  • Be flexible. It might be fun to playfully summon your wife immediately, but if your wife is highly conscientious then interrupting her while she’s busy will dampen her libido. Try something like, “Come to my office when you’ve completed your current project” or “Come to my office when you have five minutes to fool around” might work better.
  • Be responsive. When the wife receives the message she should acknowledge it and provide an estimated time of arrival. “Yes sir! I’ll be there in 20 minutes” or “I’m sorry sir, I just got called away. Let’s try tomorrow.” (The “sir” makes the game more fun for me, but do whatever works for you!)

Do you ever summon your spouse for sexy fun? What works for you? Leave a comment and share.

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Write Your Sexual To-Do List On Your Spouse's Body 3

If you want to make sure to remember your sexy plans, write your to-do list on your spouse’s body!

Last week I texted to ask Sexy Corte to come down to my office so we could talk about our to-do list. She came down eagerly, because she’s extremely conscientious and loves organizing. Then I bent her over my desk, pulled down her panties, and wrote “fuck me harder sir!” on her butt. I didn’t tell her what I’d written, and it turned me on like crazy to know that the first thing she did when she went upstairs was to check herself out in a mirror.

Later that night we made sure to get our to-do list done, and seeing my writing on my wife’s skin during doggy-style was an incredible feeling. Sexy Corte repeated back to me what what I’d written, and a very conscientious and fulfilling time was had by all.

Here are some more ideas for using your spouse’s body as a sexy to-do list. Make sure to use non-toxic markers!

  • Checkboxes for foreplay. Draw five empty squares on your wife’s breasts, above your husband’s manhood, or wherever you’re inclined. Throughout the day take time to lick your spouse and check off a box each time you do.
  • Secret messages. Write a secret message on a part of your spouse’s body that your spouse will struggle to find or read. Quiz your spouse later to to make sure he or she figured it out.
  • Achievements. The wife can draw a line on her husband’s manhood to show how far she can take him into her mouth. You could also write check-marks or timestamps on your spouse’s body each time he or she has an orgasm.
  • Timestamps. Whenever you see any of your spouse’s interesting body parts, write down the current time on the part you see.
  • Places. If you have sex in an unusual place, write the time and place on an (in)appropriate part of your spouse.

Do you have any other ideas for using your spouse’s body as a to-do list? Leave a comment and let us know what you think!

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Role-Playing: Sultan and Harem Girl 4

Several wives have written in asking for more role-playing scenarios with dialogue — “GS” asks:

Your Student-Teacher role-playing post was really helpful for thinking up motives and dialogue. I’ve been trying to come up with more role-playing ideas, but I struggle to think of what to say and have a hard time getting out of my own head. Do you think you’ll ever do more role-playing posts?

Ask and you shall receive!

(If you haven’t read the how-to do sexual role-playing post yet, you might want to start there. Don’t worry… it’s normal to feel a little silly and awkward at first!)

The set-up: The Harem Girl desperately wants to join the harem, and the Sultan is trying to decide if she’s good enough.

You can use Esther 2:1-18 for inspiration if you want, and here are a few pieces of artwork that may stimulate your imagination.

For this scenario we’re going to assume that the husband is playing the Sultan and the wife is playing the Harem Girl. Feel free to reverse the roles if you want! (There were Sultanas.) It’s also important to remember that role-playing is play. Both spouses should be comfortable and have fun, even though the play puts them in roles of power and submission. This is a pretty challenging scenario because of the power dynamics, so if it makes you uncomfortable you might want to try out an easier scenario first.

The Sultan and Harem Girl scenario is fun for several reasons:

  • Power exchange. The power dynamic between the Sultan and the Harem Girl is fun to experiment with but can be intense. Instead of being equals, the Harem Girl (temporarily, for the purposes of fun) gives up her power in the encounter and submits to the Sultan’s royal authority. The Harem Girl gets to play at being shy, nervous, reluctant, vulnerable, but eager for the Sultan’s approval. The Sultan gets to play at using his power and authority to command the Harem Girl and evaluate her performance. The power disparity is enormous and might make some couples uncomfortable, so you should discuss it in advance.
  • Unfamiliar emotional hooks. Unlike many of the other role-playing scenarios we’ve written about, the emotional hooks in this scenario are likely to be pretty foreign. The Sultan may be ambivalent or negative at first — why should he take this girl into his harem? What’s so special about her? The Harem Girl needs to join the harem so she’s willing to perform for the Sultan and work for his approval. Neither of these roles is likely to be similar to anything you’ve experienced in real life, which makes this scenario pretty challenging. Because of this challenge, it may be smart to use a safe word to indicate when the role-playing needs to back off or stop altogether.
  • Clear goals. The roles may be unfamiliar, but at least the goals are simple. The Sultan must decide whether or not to admit this new girl to his harem, and the Harem Girl desperately wants the answer to be yes. One potential complication is that a no from the Sultan is likely to ruin the whole experience, so both spouses need to work together to get to yes.

Here’s a note the Sultan can send to the Harem Girl in advance to set things up:

On behalf of Sultan El Fury, Sovereign of The Sublime House of Fury, Sultan-of-Sultans, Khan of Khans, Commander of the Faithful, Custodian of the Holy Cities, Emperor of the Steppes and Seas and Islands, with their castles and cities, and all the dependencies and borders, along with many other countries and peoples,

To Miss Sexy Corte,

You are hereby commanded to attend His Imperial Majesty this evening at eight-o-clock to be considered for admittance into the Imperial Harem. You will appear in your finest perfumes, lotions, jewelry, and cosmetics and you will wear your finest clothing. Do not disappoint His Imperial Majesty, and do not be late.

[sealed with the Imperial Seal]

Each spouse should complete their preparations before the designated start time. Potential props to prepare in advance:

  • Jewelry. The Sultan and the Harem Girl can both get decked out in jewelry, real or costume. See the lists below for specific ideas.
  • Music. Pick out an Arabian Nights-style playlist that the Harem Girl can dance to.
  • Lube, vibrator, washcloth. All the usual tools and toys.

Here are some tips for the Sultan and ideas for things he can say.

  • Dress like a king. Get cleaned up and wear your best clothes.
  • Jewelry. The Sultan can have a crown, a ring, a scepter, a cape, and even a sword. It’s impossible to go too far when you’re the ruler of the known world.
  • Throne. Sit in chair on top of a coffee table to elevate yourself over the aspiring Harem Girl.
  • Attitude. You’re the king of the world, and you get what you want. You could choose to be aloof or negative towards the Harem Girl at first, but holding that attitude very long is likely to be frustrating for the Harem Girl — set expectations in advance. Sooner or later you’ll definitely want to warm up to the Harem Girl and gradually grow entranced by her grace and beauty.
  • “You may rise.” “I have heard stories about your beauty, but I see that the reality exceeds even my imagination.”
  • “You look so nervous. Tell me what you want from me.”
  • “You are beautiful. Dance for me.”
  • “Turn around, let me look at you.” “What are you best features?”
  • “Take off your clothes, but leave your jewelry on.” “Show your body to me.” “Show me everything, don’t be shy.”
  • “Why do you want to join my harem?” — The correct answer, of course, is “To please Your Imperial Majesty”.
  • “How will you serve me?” “What will you do to please me?”
  • “Tell me about your sexual abilities.” “What are you best at?” “How will you give me pleasure?”
  • “If you want to join my harem you must show me that you can…” — what is the most important ability for a harem girl?
  • “Tell me about your sexual pleasure.” “What arouses you?” “Tell me about your orgasms.”
  • “What is your favorite position?” “How do you like to be taken?”
  • “Show me how you like to be touched.” “Touch yourself while we talk.” — feel free to use lube or a vibrator if desired.
  • “Put your finger inside yourself and show me how wet you are.”
  • “Are you a good girl, or a bad girl?” “Good girls are always to eager to please, but bad girls are fun to bring into line.” — which do you prefer?
  • “Show me how deep you can take it.” “Show me how long you can go for.”
  • “When you’re close to orgasm you may beg me for permission to come.” “You must never have an orgasm unless I’m inside you.”
  • “Don’t waste a drop.” “Use your mouth to clean me off.”
  • “You’ve done well. I will see you again soon.”

Here are some tips for the Harem Girl and some ideas for things she can say.

  • Dress like a princess. Make yourself up and wear your sexiest clothes. Lingerie and perfume can be great. Shave.
  • Jewelry. The Harem Girl can wear a princess-style crown and rings, and can also wear necklaces, arm bands, necklaces, and bracelets. The Harem Girl is from nobility herself and should look the part.
  • Attitude. You’re a princess or a noble and you’re used to getting what you want, but now you’re in desperate need. You have never met the Sultan, but you know he’s a powerful man with powerful libido. He expects his harem girls to work hard and do whatever it takes to please him. You aren’t exactly sure what that might entail, but you’ve got to succeed and win his favor.
  • When you approach the Sultan’s throne you must kneel with your head to the floor until he gives you permission to stand. Address the Sultan as “Your Imperial Majesty” or, less formally, “my lord”.
  • “I humbly beg to join Your Imperial Majesty’s harem.”
  • Why do you want to join the harem? — “I know that my family has disappointed Your Imperial Majesty in the frontier war, and I hope for an opportunity to somehow earn back my lord’s favor for my family.” — The details probably aren’t too important.
  • “I am eager to serve Your Imperial Majesty however I can.”
  • “Is my lord pleased by my appearance?” “What can I show my lord?”
  • “My lord, I am very proficient at…” — what sexual acts are you best at?
  • “My lord, I am eager for you to take me in…” — what position? In what way?
  • “My lord, my orgasms are best when…” — what? How?
  • “My lord, I am a good girl. Please give me an order and let me show you.”
  • “My lord, despite my best effort I am often a bad girl. I hope that I can learn to obey my lord if I am properly disciplined.”
  • “My orgasms belong to my lord.” “My lord’s servant will never come without my lord’s permission.”
  • “My lord’s servant humbly thanks His Imperial Majesty for her orgasm.” “Thank you, my lord, for receiving me this evening.”
  • And just to wrap things up, finish with another kneeling bow.

Afterwards, break the scene and leave your roles. The game is over (for now), so go back to being your normal selves. Have a good cuddle. Talk about your favorite parts of the scene, and stay positive. Later on, after the glow wears off, discuss anything you didn’t like and wouldn’t choose to do again. If your spouse really liked some element that wasn’t your favorite, negotiate and compromise and find the common ground that works for your marriage.

Have you ever role-played with your spouse in a scenario with this much power exchange? Do you enjoy it? Did it make you uncomfortable? Leave a comment!

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Lingerie Fashion Show and Role-Playing 9

We’ve had house-guests for several days and my wife Sexy Corte has been working hard to host them; I took them to the airport very early this morning, and Sexy Corte told me that if I could do it without waking her up she’d do something “special” for me — how could I refuse an offer like that? Thusly motivated, I got our guests to the airport, sent a kid off to school, and then slipped back into bed to cuddle Sexy Corte like a ninja.

So here’s what I’m planning for our special event: a lingerie fashion show! Here are some ideas for how you can do this yourselves. The role-playing elements are optional!

This activity will require some preparation:

  • Pick a time that the wife is feeling sexy and confident with her body. This probably isn’t the best activity for right after a big meal or when recovering from an illness. You can track her cycle and plan for an evening when she’s near ovulation and likely to be at peak arousal.
  • The wife should select three to five outfits to try on. These can be lingerie, or anything she feels sexy in. The husband can pick some clothes for her also if he’s confident in what she’ll like! The husband should lay out the clothing before the activity begins so it’s ready to use.
  • The husband should wear something the wife likes him in, which for us means I’ll wear a suit or sports coat.
  • Prepare the space with low light, thumpy music, and a chair for the husband.
  • Gather whatever lube, vibrators, washcloths, and other toys you’ll need.

Scenario:

  • The wife is a lingerie Model.
  • The husband is a fashion show Director, photographer, lingerie purchaser, or some other role that leads him to direct the attire and behavior of the model.
  • The core activity of the scenario is the Model trying on various outfits while the Director watches and directs her.
  • The Director and Model can tease and stimulate each other during the show, and have sex when they just hold off any longer!

Here are some things the Model can do or say:

  • The Model’s attitude can be played in many different ways depending on your inclination. You can be shy, confident, desperate for work, eager to make a sale, chaste, or less-then-chaste.
  • Even if you’re playing shy, the Model should show off her body for the Director. You’re trying to get the job or make the sale, so you should proactively display yourself and your lingerie. Invite him to “try out” the lingerie while you’re wearing it by touching your body and teasing you.
  • Take your time getting dressed and undressed. You’ll be changing clothes several times, so have fun with it.
  • “What do you want me to try on first?”
  • “Can you help me take this off?” / “Can you help me put this on?”
  • “Do you like how I look from behind?” / “from the front?”
  • “How do you want me to stand?” / “Do you want me to kneel down?” / “Do you want me to bend over?”
  • “Do you want a closer look?”
  • Let go of your inhibitions! No one has a perfect body, but your husband thinks you’re beautiful — that’s why he wants you to model lingerie for him!

Here are some things the Director can do or say:

  • The Director’s attitude should be confident. Know what you want. Are you evaluating the Model before offering a job, or considering which lingerie to buy, or something else? Be goal-oriented and direct the Model in a way that helps you make your decision.
  • Stay fully clothed for most of the scenario, until it’s necessary for you to remove something “for testing purposes”. For example, you may need to remove your pants in order to test how accessible the Model’s body is in the lingerie.
  • “Beautiful”, “perfect”, “lovely”, “magnificent”, “graceful” — praise the Model’s beauty and physical performance. Say these things frequently throughout the show, and never be critical or demeaning. The Model is making herself physically and visually vulnerable, so be sure to praise and affirm her.
  • “Stand up”, “sit down”, “kneel”, “lie down” — tell the Model how to position her body.
  • Use your hands on the Model to position her exactly how you want. Explore her body while you’re “evaluating” each outfit.
  • Tell the Model when to change clothes.
  • “Spread your legs”, “bend over”, “get on all fours”, “arch your back” — put the Model into sexually revealing positions, with or without clothes. You’ve got to get a good look at this lingerie from every angle!

When you can’t stand the sexiness anymore, have sex! Talk about your favorite parts of the activity, and stay positive. What did you especially enjoy? Was there anything you wouldn’t choose to do again?

If you like this idea, here are a few related posts that you might enjoy:

Leave a comment and let us know how you make the most of your lingerie!

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Being Present in the Moment with Orgasmic Meditation 10

“The Future is, of all things, the thing least like eternity. It is the most temporal part of time–for the Past is frozen and no longer flows, and the Present is all lit up with eternal rays.” — C.S. Lewis, The Screwtape Letters

It’s hard to be in the present. We spend most of our time worrying about the future or re-living the past, but the present is hard to grasp. We’ve written before about the importance of making time and energy for sex, but do you ever get distracted when you’re actually doing it? Are you able to be wholly present in the experience with your spouse?

If you’d like to be more present and mindful during sex then you might want to try orgasmic meditation (or “OM”). This post will focus on wives and their orgasms, like most research into OM, but there’s no reason that similar techniques can’t be applied to husbands also.

To get started, you may want to check out this 15-minute TEDx presentation by Nicole Daedone. Her tagline for a woman who feels empty or disconnected from her husband is: “try orgasm”. Take a few minutes to watch it with your spouse.

(It’s worth noting that OneTaste, Daedone’s company, doesn’t have a great reputation. For this post we’re going to discuss the practice of OM, and hope that none of our readers are foolish enough to join a sex cult or pay anyone for sexual services.)

So what is orgasmic meditation? The practice is physically very simple.

For the uninitiated, it’s a partnered experience of stroking around the clitoris for 15 minutes, with only one goal: let go and feel.

The stroking is meant to happen in an incredibly specific way — on the upper-left quadrant of the clitoris in an up-and-down motion, no firmer than you would stroke an eyelid.

[Anjuli Ayer, CEO of Institute of OM] also considers OM a goal-less practice. “The intention is not to serve as foreplay or to get the participants to orgasm.” That’s right, while the practice has orgasm in the name, orgasming isn’t the goal. Rather, it’s to bring your attention to the present moment and experience pleasure.

The Institute of OM charges almost $200 for a single class, but Christian wives have a more affordable alternative: their husband. Here are the basic steps:

  1. Prepare your space. OM requires 15 minutes with no interruptions, so lock your door and tell the kids not to bother you. Your bed is a great place for OM, but you could use a couch or other comfortable place. You should also get some lube and a minute timer.
  2. Prepare yourselves. The wife should take off her clothes, lie down, and spread her legs with her knees up and her feet down. The husband is recommended to position himself in a very specific way: he should sit on his wife’s right side, with his left leg over her tummy and his right leg under her knees. This position should prop the wife’s knees up and give the husband easy access to her clitoris. Finally, both spouses should commit themselves to the experience and to each other for the duration of the meditation, and focus on the experience at hand (ahem). Pray for intimacy and pleasure.
  3. Begin stroking. Set the timer for 13 minutes and start it. The husband should put lube on his fingers, specifically on his right thumb and left index finger. Next, the husband should insert his right thumb slightly into the wife’s vagina. Then the husband should use his left index finger to begin gently stroking the upper-left of the wife’s clitoris, pulling back the clitoral hood if necessary. The stroke should be light and slow, and approximately half-an-inch in length. (Related: zoom technique and how to rub a clitoris.)
  4. Guide your husband. The wife should tell her husband if she wants him to change his stroking pattern: faster, slower, harder, softer, etc. Despite the name, orgasmic meditation doesn’t have the goal of orgasm. Like Ayer said in the quote above, the purpose of OM is to help you focus on the present and on intimacy with your spouse. If the wife wants to have an orgasm during OM then go for it, but wives, don’t decline OM just because you don’t want an orgasm. Does that make sense?
  5. Grounding. When the timer goes off (after 13 minutes) you should take some time to ground yourselves before separating or continuing on to sex. The husband should change his stroking pattern to a downward motion for a minute or so, and then use both hands embrace his wife’s vulva. This “hug” should continue until the wife releases and deep breath and is ready to be done. Pray and thank God for the intimacy and pleasure you just experienced together.

It’s important to note that OM isn’t intended to be foreplay. You can certainly have sex afterwards if you want to, but the purpose of OM is to promote awareness and intimacy.

In order to reverse this experience and focus on the husband, use the same basic instructions as above but substitute his frenulum for the wife’s clitoris. The wife can use a lubed finger or her tongue to stimulate her husband’s frenulum, or even take the head of his penis into her mouth. The key is the soft repetitive motion, so the approach is going to be very different than a hand job or a blowjob.

If you’re up for an intimacy challenge, consider performing OM together every day for a week, or even a month. At 15 minutes per session, you and your spouse can both OM in the same amount of time it takes to watch a TV show!

Have you ever tried OM before, or anything like it? Leave a comment and let us know what you think.

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Creating Art While Sexually Aroused 11

Sexy Corte is planning a podcast episode about sex and art, and as we were discussing it I came up with the idea for the project behind this post: what’s it like to create art while sexually aroused? We’re pretty pleased with how it turned out, and there are many ways to take the idea farther than we did this time.

The project behind this post is pretty simple: Sexy Corte created an acrostic of marital sex advice while I stimulated her with a vibrator and zoom technique. I didn’t tell her what we’d be doing until we started, so she came up with everything below while sexually aroused.

I don’t know if acrostics are “art”, but the process of creating this list was definitely performance art and extremely erotic. I think that the prompt and structure of the acrostic was critical for making this project work — if I had given Sexy Corte a completely blank slate she would not have been able to create anything substantial under the circumstances. As it was, she struggled to focus on the task at hand.

Here are a few others ideas for artwork you could create while being sexually aroused by your spouse. You might want to consider using non-sexual themes so that the resulting artwork can be displayed in public areas of your home!

  • Painting or drawing: prompt the artist with a scene or situation to create, or have the artist copy an existing work.
  • Lettering or calligraphy: have the artist copy a poem or Bible verse with an elaborate style.
  • Poetry: give the artist a prompt for writing a short poem.
  • Music: prompt the artist to compose a short piece of music.
  • Lego or other model: have the artist assemble a model.
  • Singing or reading: if you’re brave, record audio of the artist reciting a poem or passage from a book, singing a song, or playing music.

If you’re feeling ambitious you can even take on a larger project that can’t be completed in a single session — and the artist is only allowed to work on the piece while being sexually stimulated by the spouse!

Have you ever created any art while sexually stimulated? Do you have ideas for more art projects? Leave us a comment below!

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Madonna's "Into the Groove" 12

Our youngest daughter found a Madonna CD somewhere and has been playing “Into the Groove” non-stop. These lyrics haven’t changed since the first time our ancient ancestors banged two rocks together and danced around a fire.

Live out your fantasy here with me
Just let the music set you free
Touch my body, and move in time
Now I know you’re mine

These are the human ur-lyrics, if you will.

ur- : a combining form meaning “earliest, original,” used in words denoting the primal stage of a historical or cultural entity or phenomenon: ur-civilization; urtext.

The emotion, sentiment, desire, longing, and invitation behind these words are the reason why humans invented music. This music propagates the species.

The only music that can surpass this power is the hymn of glory that is eternally lifted to God in his heavenly throne room. This raw and deep embedding into the human condition is why Song of Solomon is written so sexually — not because God is sexual, but because human sexuality is one of the most primal forces that God has created in us.

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Role-Playing: Cupid and Psyche 13

If you enjoyed Role-Playing: Diana and Orion then you might like this scenario from reader SLS based on the myth of Cupid and Psyche. (Edited slightly.)

The myth of Cupid (or Eros) and Psyche can also be adapted for sexual role-playing. Here is a very simplified and somewhat modified version of the myth.

Costumes: Cupid will need a bow-and-arrow at the beginning of Scene 1 (or a nerf gun like y’all did). Psyche will need a blindfold and something to represent the “hot oil” spilled on Cupid in Scene 3 (coconut oil maybe?). Psyche will also need some lingerie or a short skirt (see Scenes 4, 5, and 6).

Characters: The husband plays Cupid and the West Wind; the wife plays Psyche.

Setting: Scene 1 occurs outside the bedroom. Scenes 4 and 5 can be acted out by walking from the bedroom (or whatever room works best as Mt. Olympus) to the closet and then back again. Remaining scenes occur in the bedroom.

Scene 1: Cupid and Psyche. Venus is offended by the beauty of the mortal woman Psyche, and commissions her son Cupid to work her revenge. Cupid is sent to shoot Psyche with an arrow so that she may fall in love with something hideous. He instead scratches himself with his own dart, which makes him fall deeply in love with Psyche and disobey his mother’s order.

Psyche has yet to find love and Cupid has the West Wind ferry her to his chambers. Cupid is afraid though that if she knows he is Cupid, the son of Venus, it will ruin things. He therefore has her wear a blindfold as he seduces her and proposes marriage.

Scene 2: Love begins. Psyche accepts Cupid’s proposal and he leads the blindfolded Psyche to the bedroom to consummate their union. Overcome with love for her he can think of nothing else but pleasuring her with his hands and mouth. After a time, she is overcome with pleasure and climaxes. After the intense focus on pleasuring Psyche, a tired Cupid snuggles with his lover and falls asleep.

Scene 3: Love Interrupted. After her climax intense curiosity overcomes Psyche about the identity of her new husband. She removes her blindfold to discover it is Cupid! In her surprise she spills hot oil from the lamp and wakes him. He flees as he is hurt and feels she has rejected him. She pursues but cannot catch him.

Scene 4: The Underworld. Desperate to find her love Psyche seeks out Venus on Mt. Olympus (a.k.a. the bedroom), who is hiding Cupid from her as he recovers from his injury. Venus forces Psyche to complete a monumental task. She is to take a box and obtain in it a dose of the beauty of Proserpina (Persephone), queen of the underworld (a.k.a. the closet).

She journeys to the underworld and the queen seemingly grants her request, sending her back with the box of beauty as well as cladding her in the finest raiment (a.k.a. lingerie).

However, when she returns and opens the box she finds that it is full of lies designed to make her doubt her own beauty and the desire of her lover for her. The onslaught causes her to faint.

Scene 5: The Reunion. Cupid rebukes his mother as he emerges from his convalescence to discover Psyche’s limp body before him. He opens Psyche’s mouth and gives her a few drops of ambrosia to wake her and grant her immortality. (That is, Cupid wakes her with his penis and pre-ejaculate.) He declares his love for her openly in front of the other gods and celebrations begin.

Scene 6: Finale. After their wedding feast in Olympus the two lovers head to Cupid’s bedroom. They stand before a large mirror as Cupid uses his hands to arouses his bride while whispering sweet nothings into her ear. He tells her to never again doubt her own beauty or the effect she has on him.

To prove his words he has her bend over in front of the mirror and pulls up her skirt (as she is so alluring he cannot wait till she is naked). As she watches via the mirror he enters her and passionately rides her until he climaxes.

The End.

We think this stuff is geeky and super-fun. Please share your ideas in the comments!

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Role-Playing: Diana and Orion 14

This is pretty geeky, but here are some ideas for performing a sexual re-enactment of the myth of Diana and Orion. (Diana is also called Artemis and Selene.) There’s no definitive form of the myth, so feel free to improvise.

(If you haven’t read the how to do sexual role-playing post yet you might want to start there. Don’t worry… it’s normal to feel a little silly and awkward at first!)

Why it’s fun:

Costumes: Diana needs a crown and a bow-and-arrow — we used a nerf gun. Orion needs a belt and sword. We were otherwise naked, but you can add more clothing if you like.

Characters: The husband plays Orion and the shepherd Endymion; the wife plays Diana and the Pleiades (The Seven Sisters).

Setting: This scenario benefits from having enough space to run around, shoot, and hide! You may also want some blankets to lie on and hide under.

For our role-playing we included eight scenes. Each scene lasted three to five minutes, except the final scene which went longer.

Scene 1: Diana and Endymion. Endymion the shepherd lays on his back and sleeps while Diana kisses him. Diana will run away if Endymion (or any part of him!) wakes up, so he does his best to hold completely still.

Scene 2: Diana discovers Orion while hunting. Diana chases Orion and shoots at him with her bow-and-arrow, until she runs out of ammo.

Scene 3: Orion chases the Pleiades. When Diana runs out of ammo Orion turns on her and her companions, chasing them down. The Pleiades are forbidden to even look upon a man, so when Orion catches one she is punished with a spank. After all Seven Sisters are caught and spanked they flee into the night sky.

Scene 4: Diana and Orion fall in love. Diana is impressed by Orion’s prowess and admires him verbally and physically. Orion is overwhelmed by Diana’s beauty and hunting ability and praises her as well.

Scene 5: Diana and Orion hunt together. The couple hunts together, but they’re frequently forced hide from Diana’s brother Apollo who is searching for them. As they roam the forest they take cover in every possible hiding place and make love, but are always forced to flee by Apollo before their love can be fully satisfied. Orion narrowly escapes when Apollo finally catches them.

Scene 6: Apollo challenges Diana. Apollo challenges Diana to an archery contest, which she readily accepts because she is the greatest archer in the world. Apollo challenges her to hit a distant object bobbing in the ocean and she does so, without realizing until too late that the target is her beloved Orion who had gone for a swim.

Scene 7: Diana attempts to revive Orion. Diana uses every power at her disposal to attempt to awaken her lover Orion. Fortunately, her sexual abilities seem to get a response from him, but will it be enough?

Scene 8: Diana rides Orion into the sky. The only way to save Orion’s life is for Diana to ride him into the sky where they explode into stars. They live together forever in the sky, Diana the Moon and Orion the constellation.

Let us know if you try this, or think of a way to adapt another myth into a sexual experience!

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