This post is also available as a podcast: Podcast #010: How to Use a Wireless Vibrator in Public

(To catch up, here’s part 1 of “wearing and using a vibrator in public”.)

I won’t claim I can sew, but I can handle a needle well enough to stitch up torn seams in my clothes. Being able to fix stuff is part of being a man, and being able to fix clothes means that you need to learn a little bit about sewing.

One side benefit of my novice sewing skill is that I can undertake fun projects like this: sewing a remote controlled vibrator into Sexy Corte’s panties.

remote control vibrator black

We’ve got an event coming up that requires a babysitter, so it’s also a great opportunity for some play and experimentation. You can buy panty/vibrator sets that go together and the panties have little pouches to hold the vibrator in place, but the combo can cost nearly $100. It’s much cheaper to buy the remote controlled vibrator by itself and then sew a pouch into an existing pair of panties.

I’m planning to do the sewing this evening and I’ll post a picture of the end product when it’s complete. After the event itself we’ll post an after-action report.

Update: Read about the actual experience.

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Ah, spring is in the air!

Why does my husband want to watch me masturbate?

If at first you don’t succeed… ask for sex again. Why? Sex leads to more sex. As we’ve written here before: great sex comes from frequent sex.

Five ways to pray for your husband.

The sexiest thing you can do for your husband — hint: it’s enthusiasm.

The value of friends. Friends that build up your marriage are a treasure.

Bring sex out of the church closet and four lies about sex the church struggles to talk about.

For the dancing and the dreaming — ok, so I mostly linked this because of the corset.

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Reload this page to generate random naughty stories based on the roll-all-the-dice naughty story table.

Your naughty story prompts:

Man:Principal, Motive: Family
Woman:Chauffer, Motive: Amnesia
Setting:Supplication: one spouse needs something from the other
Sexual mood:Domination/submission
Foreplay:Restraint
Conclusion:End up naked, oral sex, quiet orgasms

Use these prompts to inspire your role-playing or to create a sexy story for your spouse.

If you need more inspiration, consult the sex adventure generator.

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This is a sequel to the Random Sex Adventure Table and also requires some polyhedral dice. If you don’t have the dice, let our website generate a random naughty story for you! (Printable Random Naughty Story Table PDF.)

The purpose of this table is to prompt your imagination. You can use it to create fantasies to play out with your spouse, or follow the prompts to create a sexy story as foreplay. Write the story for your spouse in an email, or whisper it in her ear.

If you have any ideas for items to add to any of the tables please leave them in the comments!

random-naughty-story-table

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Nothing says “welcome home!” like a warm embrace from your spouse. Travel can be frantic, and if you have to travel for work it can be a stress on your marriage. Sexy Corte and I are fortunate that we don’t have to travel separately all that often, but when we do the old saying definitely holds true: absence makes the heart grow fonder. Or, as Solomon wrote three thousand years ago:

Proverbs 13:12 — Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life.

Whether you’re separated for a long time or just a couple of nights, there are lots of things that the traveler and the spouse at home can do to make the reunion extra special.

  • Sexting. Nothing gets me and SC as excited to see each other as some flirtatious texting. You can be as graphic as you like with your spouse, but we usually focus on words and not images. Telling your wife what you’re going to do to her when you get home, or your husband that you need to feel him inside you is sure to prime the pump.
  • No kids. It really depends on your logistics, but you can really get things going if the kids away or in bed when the traveler gets home. If the traveler is really missing the kids, the one at home can still get them ready for bed so that the traveler can see them before switching the couple time.
  • Food. If the kids are in bed, Sexy Corte and I usually have sex before we make time for eating. But, however you sequence things, having some food ready for your traveler will always be welcome. After the kids go to bed you can have a stay-date to celebrate your reunion and have a grown-up meal, even if the kids had chicken nuggets an hour ago.
  • Grooming. When I’m traveling I usually use the last night of the trip to shave my man bits. It’s somewhat time consuming and doesn’t need to be done very often, and we find that smooth skin makes our homecoming sex all the sweeter. You can read more at the link — husbands, if you haven’t tried it you’re missing out. Both spouses should make an effort to clean and prepare themselves for sex, before the traveler gets home if possible. Airplane travel especially feels gross, so wash your hands and face when you get off the plane and don’t walk in the door like a stinky slob.
  • Naked greeting. I love it when SC greets me naked at the door when I come home. Sometimes she can’t — darn kids! — but it’s extra-special when she does. After several days of sexting and flirting and longing, being greeted at the door by a spouse who’s ready and eager for sex is the best.
  • Bonus. If you make time to have sex right when the traveler gets home then you can do it again before bed. Bonus sex!

Do you have any tips for welcome home sex? Leave a comment!

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I was recently in a conversation with other women and we were talking about dating before marriage. One remembered seeking advice from a counselor about how far was “too far” to go before being married. Another laughed and said “it’s funny, before you are married, you always want to push the limit on how far you can go. After you are married you think, I have to do this again?!?!” It was meant to be funny, but in retrospect has made me sort of sad.

Has sex within marriage become a chore? Or merely a duty? Where did the excitement from dating go? Shouldn’t there be more of a spark within marriage because now you can have sex?! What happens?

Honestly, I don’t know. I can only speculate. My guess is that the tiredness of our busy lifestyles makes sex one of the first things we cut out of our hectic schedules. Sexy time with your spouse should be one of your most guarded appointments. You have to guard it, because no one else will. Your boss, kids or house won’t mind in the least if they suck up that extra time from you. Connecting with your spouse, emotionally and sexually, is one of the most important things you can do.

Another thought is that maybe one spouse isn’t feeling loved. If you haven’t read the Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman, I suggest you pick up a copy and start speaking to your spouse in their love language. I know I am definitely more responsive sexually when my “love tank” is full.

You and your spouse might also need better communication. If you do or don’t like something, speak up. As much as I think El Fury should be able to read my mind by now, I know that he can’t. This comes easy for some couples and for others it will take boldness. But the more you communicate about sex, the easier it gets. Do a re-cap after sex. Try saying “I really liked it when you…”

Or maybe you need to find a way to change your attitude about sex. Again, this could be easy or extremely difficult for some. No matter what, pray about it. Pray that you can see sex as the beautiful gift that God designed it to be. Pray that you would welcome those touches and caresses from your spouse and instead of thinking “again?” you would think, “YES, again!”.

God gave us sexual needs and spouses to fulfill those needs. One of the beautiful things about marriage is that you no longer have to worry about going “too far”. There are so many ways to enjoy each other. Embrace your time together and go have sex!

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Roll a six-sided die twice and consult the tables. Use the “Even” table is your first roll is even, and the “Odd” table if your first roll is odd.

First roll was even:

  1. Our bedroom
  2. Our bathroom
  3. Kitchen
  4. Living room, family room, TV room
  5. Office, computer room
  6. Laundry room

First roll was odd:

  1. A bedroom, not ours
  2. A bathroom, not ours
  3. A hallway
  4. An unfinished part of the house (basement, attic, etc.)
  5. Back yard
  6. Wife’s choice, but not from these lists
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A note left on the kitchen counter right before the kids’ bath-time.

April 8, 2015

To: Miss Corte

Please come to my office during office hours this evening around 7:30pm. We need to discuss your midterm exam.

Signed: Professor Fury

 

[You haven’t been doing so well in this class, but you really need to pass! You might have slightly cheated on your midterm… hopefully the professor hasn’t figured it out.]

(For more details, see: Role-Playing: Professor and Student.)

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We realize that many of our readers are reluctant to share sexually-themed links with their friends, but we’re going to ask anyway! If you enjoy our blog, please use the sharing tools at the bottom of each post to share with your friends. You can also follow us on Twitterlike us on Facebook, or subscribe to new posts using the button on the left sidebar. We never share your email address with anyone, and we never send any kind of spam.

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(Click here to read the whole Sex in Song of Solomon series.)

Song of Solomon, chapter 4. In chapter 3 we spied on the Beloved’s dream on the night before her wedding and we saw her reaction to her Lover’s approach on their wedding day. Chapter 4 opens with the Lover’s admiration of his Beloved’s beauty as he arrives at the wedding. He begins at the top of her body and works his way down…

 Behold, you are beautiful, my love,
    behold, you are beautiful!
Your eyes are doves
    behind your veil.
Your hair is like a flock of goats
    leaping down the slopes of Gilead.
Your teeth are like a flock of shorn ewes
    that have come up from the washing,
all of which bear twins,
    and not one among them has lost its young.
Your lips are like a scarlet thread,
    and your mouth is lovely.
Your cheeks are like halves of a pomegranate
    behind your veil.
Your neck is like the tower of David,
    built in rows of stone;
on it hang a thousand shields,
    all of them shields of warriors.
Your two breasts are like two fawns,
    twins of a gazelle,
    that graze among the lilies.
Until the day breathes
    and the shadows flee,
I will go away to the mountain of myrrh
    and the hill of frankincense.
You are altogether beautiful, my love;
    there is no flaw in you.

The Lover is completely entranced with the beauty of his Beloved! He compliments all the features we men notice in modern times, and he grows more intimate as he moves down her body. Eyes, hair, teeth, lips, neck, breasts… but what’s this about a mountain and a hill? Some commentaries suggest that the mountains in the metaphor refer to the Church, and that the myrrh and frankincense refer to the scented incense that was used in Jewish temple rituals. Maybe! Song of Solomon is a metaphor for Christ’s love for the church, just as the institution of marriage itself is.

But! It’s not that hard to follow the Lover’s progression down his Beloved: head, neck, breasts, and then a heavenly-scented mountain that is perhaps too intimate to name directly. “Until the day breathes and the shadows flee”, the Lover will be caught up in his Beloved’s girly bits. It’s a lovely picture, and in my mind’s eye I can see the Beloved blushing in coy arousal. The intimacy and love described here are beautiful — the Lover is utterly smitten.

You have captivated my heart, my sister, my bride;
    you have captivated my heart with one glance of your eyes,
    with one jewel of your necklace.
10 How beautiful is your love, my sister, my bride!
    How much better is your love than wine,
    and the fragrance of your oils than any spice!
11 Your lips drip nectar, my bride;
    honey and milk are under your tongue;
    the fragrance of your garments is like the fragrance of Lebanon.

The Lover then describes his Beloved as garden of delight.

12 A garden locked is my sister, my bride,
    a spring locked, a fountain sealed.
13 Your shoots are an orchard of pomegranates
    with all choicest fruits,
    henna with nard,
14 nard and saffron, calamus and cinnamon,
    with all trees of frankincense,
myrrh and aloes,
    with all choice spices—
15 a garden fountain, a well of living water,
    and flowing streams from Lebanon.

The garden is locked, the spring is locked, the fountain is sealed. The Beloved belongs to her Lover alone, and the intimacy of their relationship is tightly guarded from outsiders. This intimacy is sexual, but not only sexual. It is their whole relationship, uniquely protected for just the two of them. The Lover ends with an evocative exhortation that is not difficult to interpret:

16 Awake, O north wind,
    and come, O south wind!
Blow upon my garden,
    let its spices flow.

The Lover’s words drip with erotic intimacy, and upon hearing her Lover’s profession of desire the Beloved does what any sensible woman would do:

Let my beloved come to his garden,
    and eat its choicest fruits.

To paraphrase: Come get some.

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