God’s best plan is for people to have amazing sex inside marriage, and zero sex outside marriage. This plan is obviously extremely counter-cultural, and some people even claim it’s impossible “in this day and age” — as if our ancestors were less sexual than we are. By God’s grace and the power of the Holy Spirit it is possible to have a sex life that’s awesome and that pleases God (even if you’ve made mistakes). It’s also natural to wonder “what if?” Are there sexual experiences you’re missing out on? Is there a way to have variety without cheating? Jordan Peterson answers this question from one of his listeners in the video below:
I married young and have had only one sexual partner. Now I desire variety, but value my marriage and will not cheat. Any insight on overcoming this conflict?
(The video is queued up to start at this question.)
We’ve got a million posts here on our blog with ideas for creating variety in your sex life with your spouse! Hopefully we’ve created a valuable resource, and we personally appreciate all the contributions from our readers.
Sexy Corte and I like trying new positions, and we’ve found these sex position guides to be useful. (They definitely aren’t safe for work, but I didn’t see any actual nudity.)
When it comes to sexual positions, there are a few important things to remember.
- Remember your purpose. Sex with your spouse should be fun, loving, and intimate. Husbands especially can get focused on accomplishing a position while forgetting the higher purpose.
- Don’t get obsessed with novelty. Most couples have sex in the same few ways 90% of the time. That’s normal! It’s great to try new things, but it’s not a competition. Your friends and neighbors aren’t secretly out-doing you with insane new sex positions every night.
- Combinations multiply your options. You can significantly increase your variety by using multiple positions in a single sex session. A set of 10 positions can make 720 permutations if you use three positions per session!
- Some of the positions you’ll see aren’t anatomically possible. I mean, seriously… some pictures have joints bending backwards, limbs attached at the wrong place, or holes implied where they simply don’t exist. Some of the things pictured are impossible for any human to accomplish. I think the artists and authors of these guides just need to fill space.
- “What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun.” — Ecclesiastes 1:9. There aren’t really any new positions, just positions that are new to you. Humans have been having sex for a long time.
- Don’t forget her orgasm. In our experience, most positions aren’t very stimulating for the wife. Don’t forget to take care of her needs. Ladies first, as we say.
- Position guides make great foreplay. Sexy Corte and I sometimes email links to positions to each other during the day. Even if we don’t do anything fancy that night, the mental stimulation gets us in the mood!
- Be careful! You can seriously injure yourself if you aren’t wise, especially husbands.
Do you have any more position guides that you’ve enjoyed? Any tips for exploring a variety of positions? Leave a comment!