Not having been born with one myself, it took some time and experience for me to learn how to properly pleasure a clitoris — and I imagine most husbands are in the same boat.
If this podcast is a blessing to your marriage, please leave a 5-star review and tell a friend!
How to Rub a Clitoris: Pulling Back the Curtain (https://marriedchristiansex.com/blog/physical-techniques/how-to-rub-a-clitoris-pulling-back-the-curtain/)
Thumb and Finger Zoom Technique (https://marriedchristiansex.com/blog/physical-techniques/thumb-and-finger-zoom-technique/)
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Yes, more of these please! Love the idea of a podcast. Love the mission to change the stigma surrounding sex and positive exploration within the healthy parameters God intended for us.
One critique, if this audio venture is successful, consider a home studio booth and a quality microphone. Neither needs to be very expensive to make huge audio quality improvements. For many people who are into podcasts, this won’t be the only one they listen to (it’s only one of a dozen for myself) and it may help to secure returning listeners.
Thanks for the feedback, Daniel. I agree that we need a better microphone. Is the audio quality now aggravating? Mildly annoying?
Good work! The line “the adult version of pat your head and rub your belly” made me laugh pretty hard. Great stuff!
Thanks for the pointers.
Been married for 12 yr and have never managed to bring my wife over the top. Oral was the only thing that ever got her really close, and she would get REALLY close (legs shaking, some involuntary contractions, tingling, feeling like she had to pee), but we never made it all the way.
That was years ago and then we went through a really long spell (not even sure how long, maybe 5 yr) where she refused oral pretty much 100%. Lately, I’ve really pursued her avidly both emotionally and physically and she’s opened back up and allowed me oral almost every time the last few months. I haven’t gotten her as close as we used to get yet, but we’re running into the same problem as we did before–she really enjoys it for a few minutes, the clitoral head does noticeably enlarge, but the sensations eventually become too strong and to the point of being (borderline) painful. I am curious if you any ideas on what I’m doing wrong and could give some advice (it’s hard to find good tips from a safe website).
For reference, here are the basics of what we do:
I do try to make sure we have good non-sexual foreplay/interaction beforehand.
Usually a bit of sexual discussion also, then move onto oral.
She does not get much out of stimulation to the hooded section and prefers direct stimulation on the exposed part.
I’ve not really had success with manual stimulation, so I do not do any of that prior.
We do not use any lubricant.
Sorry if that was too much detail! I’m just curious if I may be “ramping up” too fast. Or maybe my tongue is too dry/rough? Or could I be doing too much movement/not enough pressure? I’m sure this isn’t easy to try to help…but since my wife and I have only been with each other (which we’re thankful for), we really don’t have any perspective.
We also have recently purchased two vibrators, but have yet to use them sexually…
Thanks!
-Scott
Even though oral sex seems to be a common way for women to reach orgasm, it’s not for everyone. My wife Sexy Corte doesn’t climax from oral sex either. Maybe for your wife it just isn’t her thing.
You don’t say it directly, but has your wife ever had an orgasm?
Hello EF,
That is correct, never had one in our 12 years married. And she’s had no other partners and only masturbated a very small amount (with no attempt to really get going).
Actually, I guess it’s technically not true that she hasn’t had an orgasm. She had several IN HER SLEEP while pregnant with each our our four kids. The sensations woke her up several times…she estimates roughly three times with each pregnancy. She didn’t tell me about this until I really started re-pursuing her emotionally/sexually about 6 weeks ago, so I never got a chance to really chase an orgasm with my pregnant wife (and we’re done having kids now). By the way, in some ways it’s incredibly humiliating that my wife can orgasm in her sleep but not from anything I’ve done with her; however, I was kind of shocked at my reaction to learning this, which was nothing but happiness for her that she’s at least experienced that in some way.
As for oral, that’s the only thing that’s really ever gotten her going. I think she’s more self-conscious of my doing manual than oral oddly, so we haven’t done it much. Other than the vibrators, I don’t know what else I can do for her (we’re both pretty sexually conservative, her moreso than I). She’s open to the vibrators (I brought them up one night last month, which was extremely intimidating for me), and we got the Dame Fin and We-Vibe Touch. The Touch seems like a real boss in terms of power, wow…I’m excited to try it. We pulled them out and tested them non-sexually a few days ago, but I have openly delegated to her when we’ll actually try it…I honestly expect her to do it in our next gourmet session, as she was very tempted to in our last and that was before testing them.
Sorry for the long text, I can get overly wordy sometimes.
Thanks for any advice you have!
-Scott