Photographer-and-Model is a fun role-playing scenario that can help facilitate sexual communication and vulnerability. You can probably figure out the basics yourself: one spouse plays a Photographer, and the other plays a Model who is being photographed. This post is going to assume that the husband is the photographer and the wife is the model, but feel free to switch roles.
(If you haven’t read the how to do sexual role-playing post yet you might want to start there. Don’t worry… it’s normal to feel a little silly and awkward at first!)
Photographer-and-Model is fun for several reasons:
- Photographer leads, Model follows. It’s the Photographer’s responsibility to lead the session and tell the Model how to act and pose, and it’s the Model’s job to follow direction. Having clearly defined roles can create space for each spouse to exercise his or her creativity without being overrun by the other.
- Clearly communicated desires. The Photographer has permission within the scene to directly state his desires for the Model. This is a great opportunity for a spouse who has difficulty expressing his desires out of shyness, or for fear of judgement or rejection. The Photographer should be bold and clear, and should have confidence in the Model’s support and obedience.
- Uninhibited physical exhibition. The Model has the opportunity to flaunt her body at the Photographer’s direction. For a spouse who is shy or reluctant to show off her body, this is a chance to set her inhibitions aside and receive praise and admiration from her spouse for her beauty and grace.
Getting started is easy!
- Camera: Will you use a real camera, or just a prop? If you’re using a real camera, make sure you both agree on what will happen to the pictures later — delete, save, print-and-delete, or something else.
- Outfits: Pick out some costumes or outfits for the Model to wear during the photo shoot. We assume the Model will be getting naked eventually, but she doesn’t have to start that way.
- Location and props: Your bedroom or home is probably the easiest location for a nude photo shoot, but more power to you if you can find another option! Either way, get all your props and sets ready before you get started.
- Tone: What’s the tone of the role-playing? Is the Model reluctant to get naked or perform sex acts on camera? Or does she already know this is a nude photo shoot? Is she being paid to perform? Does she need to be talked into it? Or maybe the Model wants to take things farther than the Photographer does!
Here are some things the Photographer can do and say:
- You’re a brilliant artist and the Model is your canvas.
- Speak in statements, not questions. Don’t ask the Model to do things — tell her what to do, how to pose, what to wear, and what mood or expression you want from her.
- Make sure to use a real physical object as a prop camera, even if you aren’t taking real pictures. The prop can make you feel bolder and more official if you’re feeling shy or hesitant, and it can even give you some psychological “protection” when you hide behind it. Don’t underestimate the value of props!
- Stay fully clothed for most of the role-playing, until it’s time for the Model to perform a sex act on you. Being clothed will create some psychological distance between you and the Model and heighten the sexual tension.
- “Beautiful”, “perfect”, “lovely”, “magnificent”, “graceful” — praise the Model’s beauty and physical performance. Say these things frequently throughout the shoot, and never be critical or demeaning. The Model is making herself physically and visually vulnerable, so be sure to praise and affirm her.
- “Stand up”, “sit down”, “kneel”, “lie down” — tell the Model how to position her body.
- “Look at me”, “look away”, “look over there” — tell the Model how to position her head and face.
- “Freeze”, “hold still” — have the Model hold still while you take pictures.
- “Be happy”, “be shy”, “be surprised”, “be embarrassed”, “be excited”, “be sexy” — tell the Model what attitude or expression you want from her.
- Use your hands on the Model to position her exactly how you want.
- Tell the Model when to change outfits. (If you want to push her role-playing, tell her to change back and forth and see how obedient she can be without complaining.)
- “Take off your top”, “take off your bra”, “take off your dress”, “take off your panties” — push the Model towards nakedness, but it doesn’t have to be monotonic. You can have her remove her bra, and then change into a different outfit; or try the same outfit but without a bra on beneath it.
- “Spread your legs”, “bend over”, “get on all fours”, “arch your back” — put the Model into sexually revealing positions, with or without clothes.
- “Keep looking at the camera” — if your Model is shy, she may unconsciously look away from the camera when she’s in a sexually revealing position.
- “Cover yourself with your hands” — have the Model protect her modesty.
- “Touch yourself”, “stimulate yourself”, “penetrate yourself” — tell the Model to perform sexual acts on her own body, and be as explicit as possible.
- Take pictures while the Model performs oral sex on you.
- Take pictures while you penetrate the Model.
- Take pictures while the Model climaxes.
- Take pictures of your semen in or on the Model’s body or face.
In this scenario the Model doesn’t really have to say much! Here are some tips for playing her role:
- Bluntly: Do what you’re told and keep your opinions to yourself. Your spouse, the Photographer, may not know anything about how to do a real photo shoot, and if you give him suggestions or “helpful” criticism it may shut him down completely. Let the Photographer play the brilliant artist! (But speak up if you want to slow down or stop, of course.)
- If the Photographer asks for help or acts unsure of himself, just tell him “you’re doing great, I’m having fun, and I’m happy to do whatever you tell me”. The Photographer is making himself vulnerable by taking responsibility for the shoot, so be sure to praise and affirm him without undermining his lead.
- Let go of your inhibitions! No one has a perfect body, but your husband thinks you are beautiful — that’s why he wants to photograph you.
- Give it your all. Posing, acting, and following directions are harder to do than you might think at first. Don’t ask questions, even to clarify, just do your best to give the Photographer what he wants.
When you can’t stand the sexiness anymore, have sex and finish up. Talk about your favorite parts of the scene, and stay positive. What did you especially enjoy? Was there anything you wouldn’t choose to do again? And check out the role-playing tag for more ideas!
Have you ever role-played Photographer-and-Model, or even taken real sexy picture of your spouse? Leave a comment and share your tips with us.
Thank you so much. As a newly wed of almost 8 months, this makes me so excited to learn new things with my beloved! M.T.