Sexy Corte’s favorite foreplay is what we call “comfy position”:  we lie down on our sides, face-to-face, and cuddle with her top leg over my hip while my lubed finger plays with her lady bits. Usually I’m on my left side and she’s on her right side; she rests her head on my left arm and cuddles up against me, and I reach between her legs with my right hand. We use a bunch of lube so my fingers are slick, and then I rub her gently until she wants me to stop.

Comfy position is relaxing and easy on our bodies, so we can do it for as long as Sexy Corte likes. She doesn’t choose to reach orgasm this way, but she finds it hypnotic and relaxing. It’s pretty similar to how I feel when she’s giving me a blowjob, but it’s a lot less work! She could orgasm in this position if we persisted (or used a vibrator) but we seem to use it exclusively for foreplay. We call it “Phase 1” of our usual sex routine.

We’ve written about orgasmic meditation, but it’s not a practice that has really stuck with us. I think comfy position has taken its place as foreplay, and it achieves many of the same goals for Sexy Corte and myself. I enjoy pleasuring her, and she enjoys receiving pleasure in a relaxing, comfortable position.

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Buddy the Elf said “First we’ll make snow angels for two hours, then we’ll go ice skating, then we’ll eat a whole roll of Tollhouse Cookie Dough as fast as we can and then we’ll snuggle“. There are few pleasures in life that are greater than snuggling. However, in our busy lives, how often do we take time to snuggle? Buddy was onto something with scheduling time to snuggle. Put snuggling on your calendar — or set an alarm to snuggle.

Snuggling has a lot of health benefits. When you snuggle, you release oxytocin, which does all sorts of wonderful things. Oxytocin can make you feel all lovey, can boost your immune system, relieve pain, lower stress, and help you sleep better. It’s the chemical that is released in nursing mothers that deepens the bond between the mother and child. Human touch can also release dopamine, which can increase intimacy and enhance your lovemaking experience.

There are a variety of ways to snuggle:

  • Spooning: El Fury and I have a ‘Snuggle Alarm’ that goes off 10 minutes before we actually want to get up. Actually, it goes off 10 minutes before we have sex… and then we get up. I love that 10 minutes in the morning. I roll to my side and El Fury nestles up behind me for spooning. We lay there in a sleepy state, sometimes talking about how we slept, sometimes lucid dreaming. If I’m going to have sexy dreams, those usually take place during this 10 minutes of snuggling. We also spoon for a few minutes before we fall asleep.
  • Snuggle Classic: There are times that my body craves sidling up to El Fury, laying my head on his chest and draping a leg casually over one of his. This is a great position right before bed, especially if El Fury is still reading and I’m drifting off to sleep.
  • Sexy Snuggling: My favorite foreplay position! I can stay in this position forever, it is so delightful. El Fury and I face each other, I prop my leg up on top of his and nuzzle my face into his neck. He plays with my lady bits while I lay there and bask in comfort, and eventually I start to play with him. Time disappears. At some point I’m motivated by the thought of the kids waking up and we switch to a more aggressive foreplay position.
  • Sit next to each other: This seems simple, but even sitting close to each other while watching a show or parallel playing can still give you the benefits of snuggling.
  • Spontaneous Snuggle: Sometimes a quick hug or snuggle does the trick! Be mindful to make intentional touch-points throughout your day. If El Fury is sitting at his computer and I come in to ask him a question, he opens up his arms and I hop on his lap for a minute.

Do you and your spouse snuggle? What are your favorite ways to snuggle? I hope you enjoy each other in this way. Marriage is a blessing, and the presence of someone you love is one of God’s greatest gifts. Don’t let the time slip by without enjoying the simple pleasure of snuggling.

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