Here’s an easy foreplay idea that can pay off all day long.
Get a non-toxic marker.
Husband, get an erection.
Wife, take your husband as deep into your mouth as you can.
Husband, use the marker to draw a line on your penis to mark the depth.
The husband will remember the experience for as long as the mark lasts on his penis. The mark from a non-toxic watercolor marker will probably wash off in the shower, but that’s ok, it’s easy enough to measure and mark again.
If you want to make a game of it, the wife can challenge herself to keep beating her record over the course of the day, leaving a series of memorable stripes for her husband to enjoy. At the end of the day, consider using henna to make a long-lasting mark to commemorate the wife’s accomplishment. And, of course, make sure the wife is suitably rewarded for her effort and determination!
Costumes: Cupid will need a bow-and-arrow at the beginning of Scene 1 (or a nerf gun like y’all did). Psyche will need a blindfold and something to represent the “hot oil” spilled on Cupid in Scene 3 (coconut oil maybe?). Psyche will also need some lingerie or a short skirt (see Scenes 4, 5, and 6).
Characters: The husband plays Cupid and the West Wind; the wife plays Psyche.
Setting: Scene 1 occurs outside the bedroom. Scenes 4 and 5 can be acted out by walking from the bedroom (or whatever room works best as Mt. Olympus) to the closet and then back again. Remaining scenes occur in the bedroom.
Scene 1: Cupid and Psyche. Venus is offended by the beauty of the mortal woman Psyche, and commissions her son Cupid to work her revenge. Cupid is sent to shoot Psyche with an arrow so that she may fall in love with something hideous. He instead scratches himself with his own dart, which makes him fall deeply in love with Psyche and disobey his mother’s order.
Psyche has yet to find love and Cupid has the West Wind ferry her to his chambers. Cupid is afraid though that if she knows he is Cupid, the son of Venus, it will ruin things. He therefore has her wear a blindfold as he seduces her and proposes marriage.
Scene 2: Love begins. Psyche accepts Cupid’s proposal and he leads the blindfolded Psyche to the bedroom to consummate their union. Overcome with love for her he can think of nothing else but pleasuring her with his hands and mouth. After a time, she is overcome with pleasure and climaxes. After the intense focus on pleasuring Psyche, a tired Cupid snuggles with his lover and falls asleep.
Scene 3: Love Interrupted. After her climax intense curiosity overcomes Psyche about the identity of her new husband. She removes her blindfold to discover it is Cupid! In her surprise she spills hot oil from the lamp and wakes him. He flees as he is hurt and feels she has rejected him. She pursues but cannot catch him.
Scene 4: The Underworld. Desperate to find her love Psyche seeks out Venus on Mt. Olympus (a.k.a. the bedroom), who is hiding Cupid from her as he recovers from his injury. Venus forces Psyche to complete a monumental task. She is to take a box and obtain in it a dose of the beauty of Proserpina (Persephone), queen of the underworld (a.k.a. the closet).
She journeys to the underworld and the queen seemingly grants her request, sending her back with the box of beauty as well as cladding her in the finest raiment (a.k.a. lingerie).
However, when she returns and opens the box she finds that it is full of lies designed to make her doubt her own beauty and the desire of her lover for her. The onslaught causes her to faint.
Scene 5: The Reunion. Cupid rebukes his mother as he emerges from his convalescence to discover Psyche’s limp body before him. He opens Psyche’s mouth and gives her a few drops of ambrosia to wake her and grant her immortality. (That is, Cupid wakes her with his penis and pre-ejaculate.) He declares his love for her openly in front of the other gods and celebrations begin.
Scene 6: Finale. After their wedding feast in Olympus the two lovers head to Cupid’s bedroom. They stand before a large mirror as Cupid uses his hands to arouses his bride while whispering sweet nothings into her ear. He tells her to never again doubt her own beauty or the effect she has on him.
To prove his words he has her bend over in front of the mirror and pulls up her skirt (as she is so alluring he cannot wait till she is naked). As she watches via the mirror he enters her and passionately rides her until he climaxes.
We think this stuff is geeky and super-fun. Please share your ideas in the comments!
Husband uses a vibrator on the wife’s clitoris to bring her to orgasm with his penis in her mouth.
New Faithful is great for three primary reasons:
It’s a good way for Sexy Corte to orgasm while she’s on her period.
The position is comfortable for Sexy Corte — she just has to lie on her back.
I love the feel of her having an orgasm with my penis in her mouth.
Ok, so here are the two innovations that made this post worth writing.
First, we’ve discovered that New Faithful is awesome for frenulum stimulation. (The frenulum is a small area under the head of the penis that is similar to the female clitoris.) In New Faithful the wife can lay with her head and mouth pointing straight up and the husband can rest his frenulum right on her lips and mouth — like a golf ball on a tee. The wife should use her tongue to wet her lips and lick the frenulum while the husband rubs himself forward and backwards on her mouth. You might also incorporate some tasty edible lube!
This technique can be sustained for a long time because the wife doesn’t have to twist her neck or work her jaw to perform oral sex, and endurance is important because reaching an orgasm from frenulum stimulation alone can take a while. I actually haven’t been able to do it yet — the nature of the stimulation is different and more gradual than what a man experiences “normally” with stimulation of the whole shaft of the penis. Achieving a frenulum orgasm is one of my sexual goals!
Second, we’ve discovered that Sexy Corte really enjoys the combination of her holding an egg vibrator on herself while I stimulate her clitoris with my fingers. The vibrator and my fingers work together to drive her crazy, and she has an easy time reaching orgasm this way while performing oral sex on me. This has become our go-to activity to give her an orgasm while she’s on her period.
Sometimes people have questions on how to do Old Faithful and New Faithful, so feel to ask in the comments. And don’t be shy about sharing your own tips!
This is pretty geeky, but here are some ideas for performing a sexual re-enactment of the myth of Diana and Orion. (Diana is also called Artemis and Selene.) There’s no definitive form of the myth, so feel free to improvise.
(If you haven’t read the how to do sexual role-playing post yet you might want to start there. Don’t worry… it’s normal to feel a little silly and awkward at first!)
Brainy. You can be smarty-pants and read the myth together before you role-play.
Costumes: Diana needs a crown and a bow-and-arrow — we used a nerf gun. Orion needs a belt and sword. We were otherwise naked, but you can add more clothing if you like.
Characters: The husband plays Orion and the shepherd Endymion; the wife plays Diana and the Pleiades (The Seven Sisters).
Setting: This scenario benefits from having enough space to run around, shoot, and hide! You may also want some blankets to lie on and hide under.
For our role-playing we included eight scenes. Each scene lasted three to five minutes, except the final scene which went longer.
Scene 1: Diana and Endymion. Endymion the shepherd lays on his back and sleeps while Diana kisses him. Diana will run away if Endymion (or any part of him!) wakes up, so he does his best to hold completely still.
Scene 2: Diana discovers Orion while hunting. Diana chases Orion and shoots at him with her bow-and-arrow, until she runs out of ammo.
Scene 3: Orion chases the Pleiades. When Diana runs out of ammo Orion turns on her and her companions, chasing them down. The Pleiades are forbidden to even look upon a man, so when Orion catches one she is punished with a spank. After all Seven Sisters are caught and spanked they flee into the night sky.
Scene 4: Diana and Orion fall in love. Diana is impressed by Orion’s prowess and admires him verbally and physically. Orion is overwhelmed by Diana’s beauty and hunting ability and praises her as well.
Scene 5: Diana and Orion hunt together. The couple hunts together, but they’re frequently forced hide from Diana’s brother Apollo who is searching for them. As they roam the forest they take cover in every possible hiding place and make love, but are always forced to flee by Apollo before their love can be fully satisfied. Orion narrowly escapes when Apollo finally catches them.
Scene 6: Apollo challenges Diana. Apollo challenges Diana to an archery contest, which she readily accepts because she is the greatest archer in the world. Apollo challenges her to hit a distant object bobbing in the ocean and she does so, without realizing until too late that the target is her beloved Orion who had gone for a swim.
Scene 7: Diana attempts to revive Orion. Diana uses every power at her disposal to attempt to awaken her lover Orion. Fortunately, her sexual abilities seem to get a response from him, but will it be enough?
Scene 8: Diana rides Orion into the sky. The only way to save Orion’s life is for Diana to ride him into the sky where they explode into stars. They live together forever in the sky, Diana the Moon and Orion the constellation.
Let us know if you try this, or think of a way to adapt another myth into a sexual experience!
So now we’re going to travel back in time all the way to 2008 — to the best of my knowledge, female orgasms haven’t changed much since then. A writer named PeppermintGirl wrote two posts about multiple orgasms at the Christian Nymphos blog that we thought some of our readers might find useful. First she writes about sequential orgasms.
Having multiple orgasms is a learned response. If you are going to teach yourself first, a bullet or vibe may work better then your fingers. Get nice and comfortable. Think of how you can bring yourself to orgasm without over stimulating your clitoris. In the past an ultra sensitive clitoris has been what has held me back from going for more but with time and retraining of my brain I have learned to get past it. If your husband is a willing participant then having him performing oral or using a toy on you first would be ideal. […] Once you do have that first orgasm bask in the afterglow for a minute and slowly begin exploring again. You want to keep that clitoris engorged so don’t bask too long!!!
This second orgasm will take longer to achieve because your body is not use to going for more. You may be sensitive when you first start again but keep working through it just be gentle. After that ultra sensitive time period has passed you can begin using more pressure to bring that second O on. […] After your second orgasm make note of how long it took you. We are trying to get them as close together as possible. The more you try to achieve multiple o’s the easier it will become. Just like so many other things, practice makes perfect!
These types of orgasms usually come from a little luck and a lot of hard work. First my body had to learn how to shorten my refractory time to nothing. You read that correctly, women have a refractory time too. I talked about how to do this in “Multiple Orgasms; Part One”. Once you master sequential orgasms then your body may start having these “bunches of o’s”.
Bunches of O’s: This type of orgasm comes one after the other in a continuous string until you decide to stop. They are much less common then the sequential o’s but they are possible. You just need to work at shortening the time between your sequential o’s and with some persistence these “Bunches of O’s” can be achieved. Instead of basking in the glow like we discussed in part one of this series you keep the stimulation going constantly. The last time I had one of these my poor husband thought he was going to have to perform CPR. Do I have this type of contraction every time I have an orgasm? No, but when they happen it is a nice surprise.
There are two obstacles to Sexy Corte having limitless orgasms:
Sensitive clitoris. Strong stimulation after an orgasm feels unpleasant or painful, so we have to back off.
It’s hard work. It isn’t easy to have tons of orgasms in a row, and most of the time Sexy Corte doesn’t think it’s worth the effort.
Like PeppermintGirl wrote, having an orgasm is a physical skill that you can improve with practice and effort. The practice can be pretty fun, but the effort is real. Whether you’re trying for multiple, sequential, “bunches”, or just easier orgasms, you can move towards your goal if you put in the work. But… don’t be so goal-oriented that you miss out on intimacy with your spouse!
We haven’t experienced a continuous stream of orgasms yet, but there was one night early in our marriage when I gave Sexy Corte seven sequential orgasms in one session. Maybe someday we’ll have energy for that again!
Do you have any tips or tricks for multiple orgasms? Let us know in the comments!
We first wrote about the possibility of sex in Heaven in 2015 and built an argument primarily from the Bible, and today we’re revisiting the topic by looking at the works of a few brilliant thinkers and artists.
As we noted previously, one of the key verses relating to sex in Heaven is Matthew 22:23-33. Here, some Jewish leaders who don’t believe in an afterlife (the Sadducees) attempted to trip up Jesus by asking him about a hypothetical woman who was married to seven men: whose wife would she be in Heaven? Jesus responds:
You are wrong, because you know neither the Scriptures nor the power of God. For in the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage, but are like angels in heaven.
Go to our previous post to learn more about what the Bible reveals on the topic of sex in Heaven (spoiler: some interesting clues, but not much definitive).
For today, let’s begin with this passage from the 20th-century’s preeminent literary critic Northrop Frye, who writes about these Matthew verses in his book “Words with Power”:
[w]hile many would feel that the inference was obvious that angels are asexual — “barren angels,” as Donne would call them — the inference is not inevitable.
Northrop Frye, “Words with Power”, Chapter 6
Just because angels are not “given in marriage” does not mean they are asexual.
In “Paradise Lost” John Milton gives us two striking perspectives on angelic sexuality. First, in Book V we read about Eve preparing a meal and serving it to Adam and the visiting angel Raphael.
… Mean while at table Eve Ministered naked, and their flowing cups With pleasant liquours crowned: O innocence Deserving Paradise! if ever, then, Then had the sons of God excuse to have been Enamoured at that sight; but in those hearts Love unlibidinous reigned, nor jealousy Was understood, the injured lover’s hell.
John Milton, “Paradise Lost”, Book V
Milton writes that the angel Raphael, and indeed all sons of God, were attracted to Eve’s (pre-fall) innocent, naked beauty and service — though without lust or jealousy. (See “The Peak of Eve’s Sexuality in Paradise Lost” for more discussion of this passage.)
Second, in Book VIII Adam and Raphael hold a long discourse on love and sexuality; near the end, Adam asks Raphael directly how angels express their love for one another. This quote begins with Adam, and then Raphael responds.
To love, thou blamest me not; for Love, thou sayest, Leads up to Heaven, is both the way and guide; Bear with me then, if lawful what I ask: Love not the heavenly Spirits, and how their love Express they? by looks only? or do they mix Irradiance, virtual or immediate touch?
To whom the Angel, with a smile that glowed Celestial rosy red, Love’s proper hue, Answered. Let it suffice thee that thou knowest Us happy, and without love no happiness. Whatever pure thou in the body enjoyest, (And pure thou wert created) we enjoy In eminence; and obstacle find none Of membrane, joint, or limb, exclusive bars; Easier than air with air, if Spirits embrace, Total they mix, union of pure with pure Desiring, nor restrained conveyance need, As flesh to mix with flesh, or soul with soul.
Raphael blushes and says whatever pure thou in the body enjoyest, we enjoy in eminence — and goes on to explain that, even better, angelic embrace is unhindered by the obstacles of flesh and bone.
Influenced perhaps by Milton’s vision, William Blake writes about Heavenly sex in “Jerusalem. The Emanation of the Giant Albion/Plate 69”.
Embraces are comminglings from the Head even to the Feet, And not a pompous High Priest entering by a Secret Place.
William Blake, “Jerusalem. The Emanation of the Giant Albion/Plate 69.”
Like Milton’s Raphael, Blake writes that Heavenly embraces are total meldings of separate individuals into a single blended whole — taking one flesh to the next level, because in Heaven even souls and spirits can be united without bodies getting in the way.
That second line of Blake contains some brilliant imagery, comparing the annual entrance of the Hebrew high priest into the Temple’s veiled Holy of Holies with the limited nature of earthly sexual union. God’s glorious presence was in the Holy of Holies, and the high priest alone was commanded/permitted to enter it once per year to commune with God and make atonement for the sins of the people. Jesus Christ, as our great high priest, has eliminated the veil and invited us all into direct communion with God.
Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has ascended into heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. […] Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.
Blake’s metaphor is this: in the same way that our communion with God will be perfected in Heaven, our sexual unions will be perfected in Heaven; Heavenly embraces will be far superior to a penis (“pompous high priest”) entering a vagina (“secret place”).
Finally, consider this passage from C.S. Lewis in his book “Miracles”.
The letter and spirit of scripture, and of all Christianity, forbid us to suppose that life in the New Creation will be a sexual life; and this reduces our imagination to the withering alternatives either of bodies which are hardly recognisable as human bodies at all or else of a perpetual fast. As regards the fast, I think our present outlook might be like that of a small boy who, on being told that the sexual act was the highest bodily pleasure, should immediately ask whether you ate chocolates at the same time. On receiving the answer “No,” he might regard absence of chocolates as the chief characteristic of sexuality. In vain would you tell him that the reason why lovers in their carnal raptures don’t bother about chocolates is that they have something better to think of. The boy knows chocolate: he does not know the positive thing which excludes it. We are in the same position. We know the sexual life; we do not know, except in glimpses, the other thing which, in Heaven, will leave no room for it. Hence where fullness awaits us we anticipate fasting. In denying that sexual life, as we now understand it, makes any part of the final beatitude, it is not of course necessary to suppose that the distinction of sexes will disappear. What is no longer needed for biological purposes may be expected to survive for splendour. Sexuality is the instrument both of virginity and of conjugal virtue; neither men nor women will be asked to throw away the weapon they have used victoriously. It is the beaten and the fugitives who throw away their swords. The conquerors sheathe theirs and retain them.”
C. S. Lewis, “Miracles”
Lewis obviously rejects the notion of “sexuality” in Heaven, but then proposes the presence of a superior intimacy to displace it, presumably called by another name. But what’s in a name? Call the perfect Heavenly embrace whatever you like, “sex” or something else — either way, I see no reason to think that Heaven will be lacking for intimacy.
Rumors have circulated that the eco-friendly beds are designed to collapse under the weight of any more than one occupant in order to discourage sex amid rising cases of COVID-19.
American distance runner and Olympic medalist Paul Chelimo added fuel to the fire by speculating the beds were constructed for “avoiding intimacy” in a tweet over the weekend.
“Beds to be installed in Tokyo Olympic Village will be made of cardboard, this is aimed at avoiding intimacy among athletes,” Chelimo claimed. “Beds will be able to withstand the weight of a single person to avoid situations beyond sports.”
But other athletes claim that the beds are sturdy.
On Sunday, Irish gymnast Rhys McClenaghan filmed himself repeatedly jumping on a bed inside the Tokyo Olympic Village to disprove the claim.
“In today’s episode of fake news at the Olympic Games, the beds are meant to be ‘anti-sex’,” McClenaghan says as he steps on top of the bed. “They’re made out of cardboard yes, but apparently they’re meant to break at any sudden movements,” the gymnast continues as he vigorously jumps up and down.
“It’s fake. Fake news,” McClenaghan concludes[.]
Most people don’t have sex by vigorously jumping up and down, so this test seems inconclusive. Did McClenaghan attempt any lateral movements? Hopefully someone will get to the bottom of this before any athletes are injured.
Would you like to have sex with your spouse all day, but your responsibilities make that seem impossible? We’ve written about daily sex, but sex all day? Well, way back in 2017 Jay Dee wrote that all-day sex is possible for busy married couples, as long as you break the sex up into flexible blocks of time.
So, I proposed the idea to my wife, who asked some good questions for clarification, and here is the plan we came up with. Basically, short 5-minute quickies throughout the day, without the intent of achieving orgasm. If it happens, no problem, but don’t chase it. Then, at the end of the day, we’d have a “proper” sex session wherein we’d both get an orgasm if we wanted it. Now, if your spouse needs more time to “warm up”, this may not work for you.
This was a Friday night, and we planned to try this out on Saturday since the only plan we had was going to church. We figured a quick session when we woke up. Another after we got home from church and got the kid’s lunch, and then our final one at night. Since it was late, we also decided just to have one of those “no orgasm” quickies at night before going to sleep.
Then we had a kid wake up at 4 am who just didn’t want to go to sleep. Most accurately, he didn’t want me to help him go to sleep, but I was trying to save my wife from having to wake up. But, after 20 minutes of him screaming that he didn’t want me, she was up anyways. Finally, he went to sleep again, and we figured, well, we’ll up anyways … so we sneaked (yes, that’s the right word) another one in.
The rest of the day basically went as planned. We had some kids crawl into bed with us before we woke up, but we managed to shoo them downstairs to get breakfast while we “got dressed”. We did break the rules at bit after lunch where we chased an orgasm for my wife for a bit. But, no one had any complaints.
Orgasms are great, and each spouse should have as many orgasms as he or she wants, but sex is about more than orgasms. Sex is critical for intimacy, bonding, and vulnerability, but it’s also fun and playful. Sneaking away from your responsibilities several times a day to have a 5-minute quickie sounds like a lot of fun, and could even make for an interesting game or challenge in the right circumstances.
So how can you prepare for the best possible day of sex?
Plan. Talk with your spouse and make a general plan. You don’t need to set sex alarms on your phone (unless you’re up for the challenge), but communicate and set expectations.
Lube. If you need some, get it ready. Alternatively you can use your mouth, which would be more fun.
Hygiene. Frequent quickies may not be great if you’re sweaty or gross. All-day sex may not be the best plan if you’re going to be doing a lot of yard work! Plan to wash up a bit if necessary before each quickie — baby wipes are awesome.
Cleanup. Put a washcloth or baby wipes in your pocket to help with cleanup.
Scout ahead. If you’re at home you can just go to your bedroom, but if you’re elsewhere keep your eyes open for appropriate locations and opportunities.
Intimacy. Put some effort into creating intimacy. Hold hands, kiss, and look into each others’ eyes.
Husbands, conserve your energy. You need to give your wife an orgasm at the end of the day, so don’t spend all your potency on the quickies!
Have fun! Don’t be too focused on achieving a goal, focus on having fun with your spouse.
Since Sexy Corte and I are working from home these days we’re going to give this thing a try very soon and report back. Please leave some comments if you have any suggestions or tips!
We recently returned from vacation and I’m happy to report that Sexy Corte had two orgasms while we were away from home and sharing a building with a ton of extended family. Yay us!
Today we’re excited to share a great idea from a reader who wants to be identified only as “JH”: how to use a hammock as portable outdoor sex furniture.
So I’m a regular reader of your blog and listener to the podcast, but I don’t think that I’ve ever written in. With the growing popularity of hammocking, I thought that might be a great topic for a blog post.
It seems to me that a hammock would be the ideal piece of outdoor sex furniture (with definite indoor possibilities as well). Here are a few of their advantages:
A) inexpensive B) lightweight C) portable D) easy to wash E) height adjustable F) typically capable of supporting the weight of a husband and wife together G) compact – easy to store and conceal H) typically equipped with their own attached pouch for self storage, which could also be used for carrying and concealing accoutrements such as lube
I’m sure that you can think of others, but here are a few of the position ideas that I came up with:
1) Coital Alignment Technique (CAT) – wife in hammock with husband straddling her 2) rear entry: wife kneels in hammock sideways 3) oral: One spouse lays in the hammock, while the other straddles at head level 4) wife on top: husband lays in the hammock and the wife straddles him. 5) rear entry: husband sits in hammock sideways on the edge and wife bends over in front of him – great for using that swinging motion! (Husband can also lie back with his legs up in the air or on his wife’s back/shoulders – great for a different angle/pressure.) 6) oral: One spouse kneels (or sits… Or stands… Remember, height is adjustable) at the side of the hammock, and the other lays in it sideways and drapes his/her legs over the kneeling spouse’s shoulders. 7) analingus: same as above, but (pun intended) with one spouse kneeling sideways in the hammock, derrière extended out over the side. 8) spooning with the wife on top (aka “the princess and the penis”): both lie in the hammock – traditional or sideways – the wife climbing in on top of the husband. 9) fellatio: wife lies in the hammock with her head turned to the side, husband stands beside her head.
Those are some great ideas, and I’m going to order a hammock right away to keep in the van. Have you ever had sex in a hammock? Got any tips to share? Leave a comment below!
Larry Young, a professor of psychiatry at Emory University and co-author of The “Chemistry Between Us” (2019), believes that men’s love of breasts is simply that human evolution has co-opted an ancient neural circuit which was originally designed to strengthen the bond between mother and infant.
Oxytocin is nature’s “love drug,” and nipple stimulation, be it from an infant during breast feeding, or from a man during coitus, floods a woman’s brain. This helps the woman focus on the task at hand. Quite simply, when men bit, nibble, suck, or caress women’s nipples, he helps her body release oxytocin in the woman’s brain producing a bonding experience.
According to Young, attraction to breasts “is a brain organization effect that occurs in straight males when they go through puberty…Evolution has selected for this brain organization in men that makes them attracted to the breasts in a sexual context, because the outcome is that it activates the female bonding circuit, making women feel more bonded with him. It’s a behavior that males have evolved in order to stimulate the female’s maternal bonding circuitry.”
For many women, nipples are erogenous zones. A new study may explain why: The sensation from the nipples travels to the same part of the brain as sensations from the vagina, clitoris and cervix.
The study, published online July 28 in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, is the first to map the female genitals onto the sensory portion of the brain. Using functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI), researchers noted which brain areas become active when women touch various parts of their bodies. The genital-sensing brain areas in women roughly correspond to the same areas in men, but the nipple finding was a surprise, said study researcher Barry Komisaruk, a psychologist at Rutgers University.
“My speculation is that this could be the basis for many women saying that nipple stimulation is erotogenic, because it stimulates the same area as the genitals,” Komisaruk told LiveScience.
So if you’re feeling distant or disconnected from your spouse, along with communication invest some quality time in breast-play. The oxytocin released will help you bond together and strengthen your relationship and intimacy.