Almost three years ago (!) we wrote about “Old Faithful”, so-named because it is reliable and one of our most frequent positions:

The position is pretty simple: I lay on my back while Sexy Corte kneels over my body at a 90-degree angle with her legs spread. I play with her lady bits while she performs oral sex on me. I’ll use my fingers to play all around outside and inside her body (see: Zoom Technique) to the point that she usually loses focus and forgets what she’s supposed to be doing.

The best part about Old Faithful is when Sexy Corte climaxes with me in her mouth. But, the worst part about Old Faithful is that SC has to do all the work. So, after extensive research we’re excited to announce a new position we’ve created: “New Faithful”!

In New Faithful, Sexy Corte lies on her back with her head on her pillow and her right arm outstretched. I get upright on my knees, straddle her outstretched arm, and scoot towards her until my manhood is over her face. From this position she can perform oral on me and I can use my fingers on her how she likes, while she gets to relax on her back. It’s a great position for frenulum technique, tea-bagging, and zoom technique. As an added bonus, I discovered something new that I like! Because her head is stationary and I’m free to move, I’ve realized that it feels pretty incredible for me to (gently!) thrust in and out of her mouth.

So there you have it: a new sexual position for you to try that no one in all of human history has ever experienced. Have fun!

Dr. Evil shaved his balls and you should too! Sure, it was an awkward joke in Austin Powers, but the truth is that ball licking feels incredible and your wife will appreciate it too — which means more licking! Both of those links have great tips and tricks for the ladies on how to pleasure their husband’s jewels, so check ’em out. The rest of this post is for the husbands.

So you’ve got a few questions before taking the plunge? Let me address some of the most common concerns.

  • “It’s weird!” Well, I don’t have any statistics about how many men shave, but I’ll tell you this: no one will be able to tell by looking at you when clothed. Unless you’re stripping down in front of people frequently, your shaving can be completely secret. Considering how many women shave, I bet the number of men is higher than you think.
  • “Shaving will hurt!” It doesn’t. It can be nerve-wracking the first time you put a safety razor down there, but if you use common sense you’ll be fine. You shave your face routinely, right? I personally shave in the shower with a cheapo disposable razor and don’t use any shaving cream or soap. The warm water is enough to lubricate the skin and razor, and the hairs just wash away. I’ve nicked myself a few times, but the spots of blood stop themselves before I get out of the shower.
  • “My bare balls will itch or chafe!” Actually the smooth skin feels awesome. No more hairs to be pulled or caught in skin or clothing. Once you go bare you’ll never go back.

There are numerous benefits.

  • First and foremost, I guarantee you will get more blow jobs. What’s that worth to you?
  • It will feel crazy intense when your wife licks your bare balls. You will love it.
  • Your wife will like not flossing with your pubes while she’s down there. The whole area will be cleaner, smell better, and be more inviting.
  • It feels great during intercourse too, especially if your wife is bare. No more hair to get caught or pulled, and lots more skin-on-skin contact in the most important places.
  • Your erection will look bigger.
  • Tea bagging is easier and awesomer when your balls can hang loose and slide into her mouth.

Do it! You won’t regret it. Tell us how it works out for you!

The kids have an annoying electronic toy tea pot that sings a really catchy song that frequently gets stuck in our heads. Sexy Corte and I like to change the words around, and we think it’s pretty funny to substitute sexual stuff into the song. So last night while I was getting ready to brush my teeth and SC started singing the song I just groaned. “I don’t want that stuck in my head!”

She laughed and said, “I’ll just go lay down over the edge of the bed by myself then. Don’t forget your tea bag when you come back.”

Naturally this made it pretty tough to brush my teeth, so I abandoned that and followed SC to bed, but she stopped me. “Aren’t you going to brush your teeth? You know how I like distracting you.”

So that’s how I ended up attempting to brush my teeth while SC licked and sucked on my balls while hanging her head upside-down off the side of the bed. Needless to say, my teeth got a very thorough cleaning.

(I guess it’s time to write a post about the benefits of shaving your balls.)