Men often wonder what an orgasm feels like for women — there’s no way to directly share the experience, but the frenulum of a man’s penis apparently has very similar nerve endings to those in the frenulum of a woman’s clitoris. What’s a frenulum, you ask?
The frenulum of prepuce of penis, often known simply as the frenulum, is an elastic band of tissue under the glans penis that connects the foreskin (prepuce) to the vernal mucosa, and helps contract the foreskin over the glans.
You’ve got a frenulum in your mouth, too: it’s the elastic band of tissue under your tongue.
Hopefully that’s enough info for you husbands to locate the frenulum of your penis. Unfortunately the frenulum is often removed during circumcision, but the important nerves may still be present in the V-shaped nook under the head of your penis.
Once you’ve found the frenulum the rest is pretty easy: ask your wife to rub it or lick it until you reach orgasm. Here are a few tips to make the most out of your experience.
- Light touch. Your wife should focus her touch on the frenulum and avoid stimulating the rest of your penis. She can use her tongue, one or two fingers, or her thumb, whichever is most comfortable for her. (Considering how long a frenulum orgasm can take to build up, she might decide to start with her hand and then finish with her mouth.)
- Don’t squeeze. Refrain from squeezing your pelvic muscles — stay relaxed. As you get more aroused you’re going to feel a strong urge to squeeze, but squeezing will short-circuit the slowly-building orgasm and lead to a “normal” orgasm.
- Lube. If your wife is using her fingers instead of her tongue, we recommend using silicone-based lube. Water-based lube evaporates pretty fast and she’ll have to keep re-applying it.
- Communicate. Tell your wife what feels the best, but try not to beg for more intense stimulation. You’ve got to…
- Be patient. Just like the clitoris, the frenulum builds up stimulation very slowly.The first time we tried this I wasn’t able to climax even after 45 minutes! The second time (after not having sex for 24 hours) I reached orgasm in about 10 minutes. (If you want to speed things up, you can cheat by squeezing your pelvic muscles.) As you do it more, you’ll learn how to reach orgasm from frenulum stimulation more quickly without cheating.
- Return the favor. You may as well keep your fingers busy playing with your wife while she touches you! Your wife is hopefully pretty familiar with clitoral stimulation and will probably reach orgasm long before you do (if you don’t cheat).
Even though the stereotype is that men are more familiar with their bodies than women are, many men have little experience with their frenulum as a distinct part of their penis. Hopefully this technique will give some husbands and wives a new way to explore and enjoy the husband’s body! If you have any tips or questions, please leave a comment.
Update: Keelie Reason at Love Hope Adventure has posted a 10-minute video about frenulum technique. She’s right in saying that most men have no idea that they can have an orgasm this way, and it’s a great opportunity for a wife to show her husband something new about his body!