Dr. Evil shaved his balls and you should too! Sure, it was an awkward joke in Austin Powers, but the truth is that ball licking feels incredible and your wife will appreciate it too — which means more licking! Both of those links have great tips and tricks for the ladies on how to pleasure their husband’s jewels, so check ’em out. The rest of this post is for the husbands.
So you’ve got a few questions before taking the plunge? Let me address some of the most common concerns.
- “It’s weird!” Well, I don’t have any statistics about how many men shave, but I’ll tell you this: no one will be able to tell by looking at you when clothed. Unless you’re stripping down in front of people frequently, your shaving can be completely secret. Considering how many women shave, I bet the number of men is higher than you think.
- “Shaving will hurt!” It doesn’t. It can be nerve-wracking the first time you put a safety razor down there, but if you use common sense you’ll be fine. You shave your face routinely, right? I personally shave in the shower with a cheapo disposable razor and don’t use any shaving cream or soap. The warm water is enough to lubricate the skin and razor, and the hairs just wash away. I’ve nicked myself a few times, but the spots of blood stop themselves before I get out of the shower.
- “My bare balls will itch or chafe!” Actually the smooth skin feels awesome. No more hairs to be pulled or caught in skin or clothing. Once you go bare you’ll never go back.
There are numerous benefits.
- First and foremost, I guarantee you will get more blow jobs. What’s that worth to you?
- It will feel crazy intense when your wife licks your bare balls. You will love it.
- Your wife will like not flossing with your pubes while she’s down there. The whole area will be cleaner, smell better, and be more inviting.
- It feels great during intercourse too, especially if your wife is bare. No more hair to get caught or pulled, and lots more skin-on-skin contact in the most important places.
- Your erection will look bigger.
- Tea bagging is easier and awesomer when your balls can hang loose and slide into her mouth.
Do it! You won’t regret it. Tell us how it works out for you!
The kids have an annoying electronic toy tea pot that sings a really catchy song that frequently gets stuck in our heads. Sexy Corte and I like to change the words around, and we think it’s pretty funny to substitute sexual stuff into the song. So last night while I was getting ready to brush my teeth and SC started singing the song I just groaned. “I don’t want that stuck in my head!”
She laughed and said, “I’ll just go lay down over the edge of the bed by myself then. Don’t forget your tea bag when you come back.”
Naturally this made it pretty tough to brush my teeth, so I abandoned that and followed SC to bed, but she stopped me. “Aren’t you going to brush your teeth? You know how I like distracting you.”
So that’s how I ended up attempting to brush my teeth while SC licked and sucked on my balls while hanging her head upside-down off the side of the bed. Needless to say, my teeth got a very thorough cleaning.
(I guess it’s time to write a post about the benefits of shaving your balls.)
El Fury never tires of having his balls licked. It is one of his favorite past times. He often describes his balls as aching for attention, and other than ejaculation, ball-licking is the only thing that can alleviate his discomfort. Our foreplay often consists of me licking El Fury’s balls while he rubs my clit. This is a win, win in my opinion. Here is what I’ve picked up over the years of ball licking.
- Always use light pressure, caressing swoops, and cover as much surface area as possible. Be gentle, and treat them with loving care.
- Using your tongue in circular motions over the whole ball gets major groans of satisfaction. Be fair and repeat on the other ball. Then repeat on the other ball. Then repeat on the other ball…
- Once in a while it is fun to throw a little teaser in there and travel up to the head of El Fury’s penis, give a playful suck on the tip, then travel back down to resume ball licking. This seems to drive him crazy.
- Occasionally I like to take a whole ball into my mouth and gently suck while swirling my tongue around. This technique works best if El Fury is standing up, but can also be fun while laying down.
- If I can catch El Fury unawares while he is laying on our bed, I like to surprise him by crawling up him to give an aggressive (yet gentle) lick traveling up his balls and penis. This is one of my favorite ways to initiate sexy time.
- It also drives El Fury crazy when I move my tongue very, very slowly over his balls. It makes him squirm a lot.
- When I really want to build suspense, I move my tongue only around the base of his balls for a few minutes. This is sure to cause some not-so-subtle movements to try to get his balls in direct contact with my tongue. I hold off until he is on the brink of frustration, then give him a long, satisfying tongue swoop.
- Tip for the men: shave. This makes you very sensitive.
In summary, any action involving your tongue and balls will make your husband very happy.