Beach Sex and Bikini Bods

It’s almost summer! I feel like we missed spring, but at least it’s not winter anymore. It’s time to cover the two topics we know all our readers are wondering about.

First up, how much do men really care about “bikini bods”? Bridget Phetasy asked her followers:

ATTN: Men I need more of your anonymous blatant honesty. Summer is coming. The culture would have us believing men care a great deal about how a woman looks in a bikini but how much do you *actually* care about your significant other’s beach body?

We’ve posted several times about the importance of fitness and appearance, but we believe the focus should be on health and being the best you for your spouse, not pursuing some unrealistic worldly standard of “hotness”. It’s great to read that most of the men who responded to Phetasy feel the same way.

To be honest, I wasn’t expecting such thoughtful, heartwarming and tender answers. (In all, 215 men responded, totaling 19,754 words, which, to give you an idea, is 34 pages of writing, single-spaced.) Instead, I expected men to behave the way they’re represented in the media (i.e., as gross pigs). And so, I anticipated vapid, crass responses, my DMs overflowing with hordes of men saying things like, “Hell yeah, my wife needs to lose 15 pounds. This isn’t what I signed up for.”

Obviously, it goes without saying that when you’re looking for a mate, physicality matters. Attraction needs to be there before anything else, but attraction alone isn’t enough to sustain a long-term relationship. This is a lesson men have a greater appreciation for with age. “In my 20s, I cared about looks,” one guy explains. “I think physical attraction is an important element in relationships, even in my 30s; however, now, I appreciate a girl who can effectively communicate more than her looks.” Another adds, “After giving birth to our three kids, my wife doesn’t have a bikini body anymore, but I couldn’t care less. To me she’s hot AF. I probably don’t even have a dad bod anymore, and yeah, I’m a little sensitive about it.”

Giving your best self to your spouse includes maintaining your health and fitness, but goes way beyond that. There’s a lot more to sexiness than appearance, and how you act is generally easier to improve than how you look. If you don’t believe us or anonymous guys on the internet, just ask Billy Bob Thornton.

Second: beach sex. From the page’s title we can see that the article used to be headlined, “women should do everything they can to avoid beach sex”.

Sand. It gets everywhere. And when you’re naked and rubbing your body up against another person, you’d better believe sand gets in places you never want sand to reach. This is particularly bad in instances where you’re having sex because when sand meets genitals, it acts as an abrasive, causing intense irritation and chafing.

Not only this, but sand isn’t the most hygienic of substances. Imagine all the infants you’ve ever known to pee in the ocean and then times it by a hundred because, according to a study from the Journal of Environmental Science and Technology, beach sand can contain 100 times the levels of fecal bacteria of seawater.

Not just infant humans… the ocean is chock full of disgusting animals! If you really need to have sex on the beach, use a blanket or a tent. Spontaneous sex in public places can be hot, but we recommend doing it standing up.

Got any summer sex tips to share? Leave a comment!

4 comments

  1. I have always felt a bikini bod was something nice to look at but at the same time prefer a “Normal” body. I wish my wife could lose her belly fat and at the same time I wish I didn’t have any belly fat plus a full head of hair. I feel the person is MORE important to me then the figure. GOD put us together and we just hit up 48 years since we did the “I DO”

  2. I apprecIate that many more men are reasonable than expected. It has taken many years for me to accept (most of the time anyway) that my husband may not be blind to my physical flaws, but they are not the point to him. (Dan at Frankly Speaking had an article that helped tremendously.) I’m in my 50’s, not overweight—well, I’d prefer to be 5 lbs less, but I am in no way bikini material. Bikinis are for the pre-baby body for most!
    Sex on the beach has no appeal to me, but in thick grass outside somewhere totally safe has has long been on my bucket list…sex in public places is on my shudder-at-the-mere-thought list!

  3. That is a complicated answer for me. If I had to choose between two girls, one who was beautiful and had a bikini body but was a cold witch, or an obese girl who was smart, a great communicator and loved sex, that is an easy choice. However, if I could have it all, I would choose a girl who was in good shape. I think couples should talk about long-term goals before they marry. I think it is selfish to let oneself goe if it is important to their spouse that they be in a good shape. It’s not that hard to turn off the TV, walk 45 minutes a day and give up fried chicken!

  4. In an idea world…we would all be 25 years young with hot bods that doesn’t have blemishes, bump, or bruises. The only new body we will get is the heavenly one promised in the Scriptures. Back to reality, my wife is not in great shape. I am working on improving my appearance yet I still have flaws. Love will see the good in the situation and this is what I can do with my wife. I can pray that God will help her to change…I no longer push or make suggestions because they are at times not received well then I sound like a nagging husband.
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